So shadowy digital repo concern Specific Media took MySpace off News Corp.'s hands for the joke sum of 35 million dollars. Thirty-five million dollars isn't cool. You know what's cool? Thirty-five billion dollars. And how do you make that much money? By getting Justin Timberlake to align his triple-platinum swag with your cobweb-strewn social networking relic.
Only one protestor showed up outside the Alcoa plant where President Obama was speaking on Tuesday, but he made his appearance count. Meet Richard McCaslin, of California, who wore striped pants and a matching "THOUGHT CRIME" hat, and held a sign that said "REPTOID ROYALTY: NO BLUE BLOODS IN THE WHITE HOUSE." Let him explain that to you:
On tonight's Daily Show, Jon Stewart opened with a segment about President Obama's press conference earlier today and his fight with Congress over its refusal to reach a compromise that would raise the nation's debt ceiling. How much confidence does Stewart have in our elected officials to put their petty differences aside? He ended the segment with "Armageddon, here we come," so, yeah, not much.
During his big press conference today, President Obama was asked about Congress' refusal thus far to raise the nation's debt ceiling. After imploring Republican lawmakers to stop procrastinating and "get this done," Obama took a shot at them by praising his daughters' study habits: "Malia and Sasha generally finish their homework a day ahead of time. Malia's 13, Sasha's 10... they don't wait until the night before!"
Cameras at an astronomical observatory in Hawaii captured this amazing... thing last week. It appears to be a sort of... flare? Astronomy blogger Phil Plait describes it as an "[a]wesomely weird expanding halo of light." We are pretty sure it is the Star Gate!
Our old friends at the Westboro Baptist Church—you know, the "God Hates Fags" guys—briefly expanded their gross little empire! To the FBI, of all things, where church big-shot Tim Phelps was invited to address agents several times "as part of the bureau's counterterrorism training program." Hmm.
School's out! And what better way to celebrate than with a dip in the pool? Just make sure there aren't any dead bodies floating in it! For two days!
Glenn Beck absolutely will not shut up about The Time A Woman Accidentally Spilled Wine On His Wife! On Wednesday he spent a full 10 minutes on his radio show tearing into a moviegoer who says he's greatly exaggerated his family's brush with death at an outdoor movie.
The premise of ABC's 101 Ways to Leave a Game Show is that if a contestant answers a question incorrectly, he or she is tortured in some elaborate way. Awesome, right? The lame part is all the crazy stunts are padded out with lots of time-killing filler. Well, not anymore!
Because there are too many shows about teachers and scientists and artists and hobos out there, one network is boldly doing a show about lawyers. Also today: a doctor becomes a ghost dad and Joe Rogan is back, ladies.
John Lennon was shot and killed in 1980 just after the election of Ronald Reagan, and it's this pairing of events that symbolized the end of the political Left. Maybe? I just made that up, but it seems like one of those things people would say. But what if John Lennon was a secret Ronald Reagan lover in the end? That's what Lennon's last personal assistant is claiming.
Can you guess who has been spotted in Lenoir County, North Carolina? That's right, it's Jesus again, in his familiar "on the crucifix" pose. (Get a new pose already, Jesus!) On toast? No, in kudzu! He is everywhere.
