Death-loving prayer overlord Rick Perry is getting ready to launch a presidential campaign, it appears! And in his first act as a kinda-maybe frontrunner, he plans to screw over Tim Pawlenty and/or Michele Bachmann in Iowa.

Twitter, the growing microblog juggernaut, basks in the glory of its celebrity users and the so-called "Twitter revolutions." Decaying BlackBerry, meanwhile, is experiencing the unpleasant flipside of product association.

Lifetime announced today that it plans to air Project Runway All Stars, a spin-off series with all new judges and 13 of our "favorite" contestants returning to compete again. Naturally, the idea made me a little bit excited, but then I realized, why do we need to watch these losers again?

Joe McGinniss, the journalist who briefly lived next door to the Palins, reports that Track Palin's wife Britta Hanson has given birth to her child, a girl named Kyla Grace Palin. As predicted, the birth was a bit earlier than abstinence advocates may have expected—three months after the Track and Britta's well-publicized wedding, and a couple weeks shy of the due date on Britta's rumored baby registry. [JoeMcGinniss]

In your untraceable Monday media column: News Corp's board meeting approaches, Current TV gets a new president, the backlash to The New Yorker's Bin Laden story, the NYT's online beta testing site, and newspapers are stolen.

You know when a little kid sees a pregnant lady drinking a glass of OJ, and he's like "No! The baby will drown!" Turns out he's kind of right. The mother-to-be is drowning her baby in flavor, and it will impact the baby's palate forever, a new study finds. NPR reports:

Here's a big of news to get the cranks all hot and bothered: The atheists are taking over America's military! Specifically for one day on one base, Fort Bragg, next spring, for an "atheism concert." Take that, God.

Bravo honcho Andy Cohen programmed himself onto the network to host the Real Housewives reunions and gave himself his own show. But that wasn't enough. Now he's writing a book about growing up loving pop culture and suppressing his homosexuality as a child. It's called Obviously Andy: The Dandy Andy Story of Growing up Andy Cohen by Andy Cohen by Andrew Cohen. OK, not really, but it does come out next summer.

Former New York Times restaurant critic and overall NYT star Frank Bruni was named an Op-Ed columnists last May, just after Frank Rich's departure. We had high hopes! We were promised that Bruni's column would be "a sharp, opinionated look at a big event of the last week, from a different or unexpected angle, or a small event that was really important but everyone seems to have missed, or something entirely different." How's that going?

Last night's episode of Everyday Italians featured the ringing in of the New Year, that grand tradition of celebrating time's zooming pace with confetti and alcohol and dancing. It's a nice tradition! One that not even these ghouls could muck up.

Pandora fan? The popular music service's stock was has been hit doubly hard by today's Wall Street carnage. Other recent tech IPOs LinkedIn and Zillow have likewise fallen more than the overall market. Sometimes panic has a rational side.

"I never gave up hope. I prayed, meditated, and now he's with us again," 47-year-old Bonni Marcus said upon being reunited beloved monkey doll Bongo, who went missing in Park Slope last week. Bonni and monkey doll dad Jack Zinzi the toy from monkey doll rescuer Luis Barreto's Park Slope apartment on Saturday. The New York Post reports:

One tactic Wikipedia has seized on to combat its dwindling number of editors is to try to attract more women to its ranks of geeky white dudes. Plus, they can edit all the girl stuff.

Gawker staff writer Maureen O'Connor appeared on NBC's Today show on August 8, 2011. Check out the clip above. For media requests, please contact Kevin Prince at kevin@gawker.com.

Remember when Caroline Kennedy convinced media executives to bury the History Channel's The Kennedys mini-series? We may now know what her bargaining chip was: ABC News (which has corporate ties to the History Channel) is preparing to air a series of never-before-heard audio tapes of Jackie Onassis, possibly conversing with historian Arthur Schlesinger, Jr. The tapes are either the juiciest Kennedy dirt imaginable or totally banal, depending who you ask.

Kanye West is running his mouth off again, this time showing some sympathy for the devil. J. Lo and Steven Tyler are fighting about money, Ashton Kutcher is a thief, and Lindsay Lohan finally met someone crazier than her. Monday's gossip is revisionist history.

How would Mike Huckabee, who not long ago was considered a likely frontrunner candidate for president, respond to the S&P credit downgrade? He would hire Donald Trump as Treasury secretary. No but really, this is his actual idea. Even Donald Trump thinks it's dumb.

It's only noon, and already the Dow has dropped by 325 241 336 points. Terror. Panic. Uncertainty. Fear. Should you dump all of your stocks and stash the cash while you still can? No. No. No!

The nostalgic prequel-type movie did surprisingly well this weekend, while the fate of an unexpected summer bomb came clearer into focus and Ryan Reynolds took his second stumble of the season.

This down-and-out actor was thrown out of a sex shop for throwing the toys around. This rapper's teeth smell disgusting. This actor tried to pray the gay away. And this Glee-full actress has a big coke problem. As long as she doesn't touch the dildos, she's in good shape.