As many as eight mass graves have been dug since June in the Nuba Mountains of Sudan, according to Satellite Sentinel Project, a group funded by George Clooney that monitors the region using satellite imagery. Two sites have been dug this week alone, based on their analysis of the pictures, which also contain evidence of body bags and bulldozers used to dispose of corpses.

On his CNN show last week, Anderson Cooper fell into a minute-long fit of giggles on live TV over a lame potty joke. The video of Cooper losing it on air quickly went viral and turned into fodder for Stephen Colbert on the following night's episode of The Colbert Report.

In the same week that a Mets game was put on hold while center fielder Angel Pagan attended to a sudden and violent onslaught of loose stools, comes yet another unusual, game-disrupting incident in a Major League outfield: Cardinals left fielder Matt Holliday had to withdraw from Monday night's game because a moth flew into his ear.

A man in the New York City neighborhood of Washington Heights brought the terror that Shake-n-Quake '11 failed to deliver by allegedly stabbing four elderly people—three women and a man—with a ten-inch knife, killing the man. He also punched out a 22-year-old neighbor. Witnesses say he was "emotionally disturbed." Bit of an understatement there.

Looks like our little Dakota Fanning is making good on her plans to attend New York University, almost mater of the Olsens and James Franco's West Village sleep-n-study center. Good for her!

As if being separated from their families while they defend their country and having to memorize Britney Spears lyrics weren't stressful enough, Marines serving downrange in Afghanistan can no longer fart loudly anymore. Noisy farts offend Afghans, reports the Marine Corps Times.

Groupon recently disclosed it owes more to merchants than it has in the bank; the online discounter stays afloat only by selling new Groupons. So the Groupon's recent sales dive is particularly unwelcome.

Felonious, hypersexual people just can't stop crashing into the AdultMart of Brownhelm Township, Ohio to steal sex toys! In the latest incident involving theft at the popular sex-stablishment, a man stole a semi and crashed it into the place, making off with a $800 "life-like masturbator complete with female genitalia with legs and buttocks."

More than four years after introducing photo tagging, Facebook will finally offer the ability to block embarrassing tags from your profile. Which is a good thing, because now anyone can tag you.

Today we heard that for-profit colleges might be going the way of the dodo. Yay! Those places are kinda bunk. And their recruiters are so aggressive, as one commenter can tell you.

Just hours after a 5.9 magnitude quake hit Washington D.C., San Francisco weather traffic guy Sal Castaneda tweeted, "Hey east coasters: welcome to our world and what we live with everyday in California. Stay Safe." Hey, Californians: Shut up and let us wallow in our abject terror.

Jay Leno's old prop has found his way to his very own starring role. Also today: Jeremy Piven writes the jokes himself, get ready to glimpse some Hunger Games, and Katie Couric has decided.

Finally, someone figured out why God sent an earthquake to the East Coast: To punish Barack Obama for vacationing. As it happens, the leader of the free world was golfing in Martha's Vineyard when the tremors struck:

What do Reddit trolls read when they wake up in the morning, before they start "work?" How do 4channers prepare their souls to die on /b/? How do super obsessive microbloggers read about Tumblr, to elevate themselves above hipsters who merely read Tumblr? Six hundred thousand dollars says the answer to those question is "The Daily Dot," the official newspaper for crazy internet people.

Old Navy just started a line of T-shirts for its Superfan Nation collection that emblazons professional and college sports teams' logos on their cheaper than cheap shirts. The problem? They all have a simple grammatical error.

Remember when an Iranian cleric said earthquakes were God's punishment for scantily-clad women, and then a bunch of scantily-clad women organized a naked protest to disprove the cleric, but then an earthquake actually occurred at the moment they bared their breasts? Well, there is a chance that today's East Coast earthquake was a boobquake, too, because it's National Go Topless Day, and there are all kinds of naked boobs in Central Park right now.

You probably remember being in school and looking across the cafeteria at all the mysterious, differently-hued people huddled at their own table on the other side of the room and asking yourself, "Why are all those weird [black/ white/ Asian/ Latino/ Unidentifiable] kids sitting together? No wonder we are so racist." Then you continued telling racist jokes to your own racially homogenous table.

Here's Texas congressional candidate Roger Williams, Republican, giving a good tongue-lashing to some welfare queen donkeys. Take some personal responsibility for once, you damnable beasts! "These donkeys don't live in the United States of France, they live in the United States of America," he tell us, before turning to the donkeys and saying, "Have you ever heard of the Constitution?" And yet this hypocrite is probably all-compliments when the elephants drop by.

Remember when Goldman Sachs was a remorseless, cruelly efficient monolith run by soulless machines intent on harvesting wealth at the expense of the global economy and without regard to consequences?

There have been several chapters in the still-extremely-early 2012 presidential race. There was the time that Newt Gingrich's smarts and policy chops was going to shake up the contest. That ended. There was the time Herman Cain's business acumen and tea party ties were going to be a real factor in the race. That didn't work out. Then, of course, there was Donald Trump. Remember him?