“My bad” is as good an excuse as any, right?

The residents of Oregon have had it with their government leadership, and are taking a non-traditional approach to public discourse: stealthy stalking, followed by a violent lashing with their inch-long talons.

A who had pledged allegiance to the leader of the Islamic State was arrested this week for reportedly planning to attack diners at a restaurant or bar with a machete on New Year’s Eve.

The campaign manager and communications director for the Ben Carson campaign have resigned, after Carson sort of promised to fire them, and then didn’t, earlier this month.

After an order issued by the U.S. general in charge of Guantanamo Bay this month, most psychologists will no longer be employed at the infamous prison. Why? Because the American Psychological Association no longer believes that working where prisoners are held without trial and tortured is ethical, and the general doesn’t want to place any employees in violation of the new rules.

The Address hotel in downtown Dubai is currently on fire, coinciding with the emirate’s New Year’s Eve fireworks display.

It’s so, so hard to get shot if you’re white, and there’s no better proof than the American sovereign citizen movement, a cadre of moody caucasian fellows, armed to the teeth against an overreaching federal government. And they’re preparing for another showdown.

Gawker sure wrote a lot about Kristin Cavallari this year, huh? Bet you’d like to know which of those posts you should catch up on before the new year. Here’s a quick roundup of our favorites from 2015:

Gold, the favored investment of Glenn Beck, Sean Hannity, and the old man at the post office who invited you over to see his industrial-size canned bean supply room, is down for the third straight year.

In a move one might expect from an Education Minister who’s said such things as “when Palestinians were climbing trees, we already had a Jewish state” and “I’ve killed lots of Arabs in my life, and there’s no problem with that,” Israel has banned an Arab-Jewish romance novel from schools for “threatening Jewish identity.” Or put more simply, it banned the book over fears that it encourages race-mixing.

Jerry Seinfeld’s Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee premiered online at Crackle last night with a very special episode featuring the president. They drove some old Corvette thing and walked around the White House lawn before Seinfeld asked a serious question: “How many world leaders do you think are just completely out of their mind?”

Many wild-eyed democracy extremists say that perhaps the United States of America should not just elect presidents who are direct family members of other presidents. But why?

A copyright fight is brewing in Europe this week as the deadline after which two key WWII-era texts will fall within the public domain steadily approaches. In Europe, a book becomes public domain 70 years after the author’s death, on the first day of January. This Friday, January 1st, both Anne Frank’s Diary of a Young Girl and Adolf Hitler’s Mein Kampf will enter the public domain.

“The area around the North Pole was about as warm as Chicago on Wednesday, and quite a few degrees warmer than much of the Midwest.” Everything is going to be just fine.

On Wednesday, the New York Times reports, police officials in Brussels confirmed that they had begun an investigation into earlier reports of an orgy, involving eight soldiers and two policewomen, amidst the November manhunt for Islamic State operatives trying to get out of Europe following the Paris attacks.

Earlier this week, the New York Times reported, with studied skepticism, that “it is at least possible that Jeb Bush is funny.” In Lexington, South Carolina, tonight, the struggling scion gave Senator Katrina Shealy a “funny” nickname. Can you guess what it was?

Enrique Marquez, the 24-year-old former neighbor of the San Bernardino shooters Syed Rizwan Farook and Tashfeen Malik, was indicted Wednesday on charges of conspiring to provide material support to terrorists, Reuters reports.

According to the New York Times, an investigation into the June 1 disaster on the Yangtze River, released by the Chinese government Wednesday through state media outlet Xinhua News, found that the incident, in which 442 people died, was caused by a combination of violent weather and human error.

Ethan “Affluenza” Couch’s mother, Tonya Couch, has been deported to the United States, Mexican officials told the Associated Press on Wednesday. The fugitive teen, meanwhile, will likely remain in Mexico for at least another two weeks and possibly several months.

At a rally in South Carolina today, Donald Trump gave a touching eulogy to the true victim of climate change—his own, unruly hair follicles.