The public relations industry is essentially a grand sleight-of-hand trick in which money is extracted from clients in exchange for building a smokescreen of wordplay around a pile of excrement ("the product"). It's a living. This is PR Dummies. Poking the poo pile, once a week.

It's been more than a year since the Japanese tusnami caused a meltdown at the Fukushima nuclear plant and the clean-up continues. But a bit of background radiation has not stopped a crew of Japanese hipsters from doing their hip business in the area. They've formed the "Gamma Watch Squadron," the world's coolest nuclear watchdogs.

Just three little old ladies doing what three little old ladies do: Watching Kim Kardashian: Superstar, and commenting on the size of Ray J's snake.

The appropriate response to Girls, a television program about whiteness, Twitter, and the irreducible sexual magnetism of abusive men, is to drown your mobile phone in the bathtub. But you need to call your mother, and today is the 21st anniversary of Nirvana signing to Geffen, so here's a recap.

On today's episode of Anderson, the silverest of foxes was introduced to Meow, the two-year-old feline who weighed nearly 40 pounds when he was dropped off at a Sanfta Fe animal shelter by his elderly owner.

It's School Board meeting time in Duval County, Florida, and you know what that means: a chance to review the disciplinary infractions of teachers in Jacksonville's public school system. This story brings you all of the amazing highlights. What sort of educational rogue's gallery do we have this month, Duval County School Board?

The theme of this video (which premiered today) just happens to be the theme of its singer's career: Rihanna is pretty. That is it. You need know nothing else to get Rihanna. Her beauty is as responsible for her success as any of her other natural gifts and those bestowed upon her by her producers, writers and managers. (Credit where it's due: despite terrible career/life decisions, her I-don't-give-a-fuck attitude is refreshing, if not fueled by the self-assurance that can result from massive fame.) "Where Have You Been" is a shoutier, uglier version of "We Found Love" from her underwhelming Talk That Talk album. Not like that'll stop it from being utterly massive! Your summer may sound something like this, like it or not.

Tennessee's House of Representatives Friday passed the controversial "Gateway Sexual Activity Bill" by a vote of 68-23, sending it to Gov. Bill Haslam for signing.

Improv Everywhere agents descend on Central Park to carry out their latest mission: Treat a random couple to a fancy dinner and private concert — all from the comfort of a park bench.

A scuffle between an Oklahoma Highway Patrol trooper and a fugitive ended Friday morning when the latter's portable meth lab exploded in his pants.

America is currently embroiled in a student loan bubble and when it pops, wooo buddy. *Makes whistling sound, gazes off into distance*... let's just say that I hope you can use some lacquer and a long stick to turn your college diploma into some sort of edged weapon to fight off the starving graduate student food mobs. Let's just leave it at that. Let's not get explicit, except to say that banks will literally take your mother's home if you try to not pay them back, so, you know, the weapon thing is maybe the way to go.

Weird Internets is a series in which we spotlight and explore funny, bizarre, or otherwise interesting corners of the internet. Today, we examine Pentametron, a Twitter bot that writes sonnets by finding rhyming Tweets in iambic pentameter, and talk to its creator, Ranjit Bhatnagar.

Warning: Spoilers (if you consider talking about something that aired over 12 hours ago "spoiling it," which I don't, but whatever, it's a free country).

Red Dragon Karate Schools founder Louis Casamassa offers some helpful rape-avoiding advice to wouldbe rapees in the film adaptation of his successful self-help guide, Rapist Beware!

World-renowned Kimberly Cole music video audition crasher Keith Apicary (born Nathan J. Barnatt) brought his signature autodidactic dance "manures" to KTLA Morning News.

Syndicated columnist and anti-bullying activist Dan Savage delivered the keynote speech at the JEA/NSPA National High School Journalism Convention in Seattle two weeks ago. Never one to mince words (or make up new ones), Savage once again criticized the hypocrisy of justifying anti-gay attitudes with bible passages while ignoring the parts that advocate for slavery or torture or other things considered offensive today.

The number one fiction book in all of America today: soft core spank-sex LOLrotica extravaganza Fifty Shades of Grey. The number two fiction book in America: the sequel, Fifty Shades Darker. The number three fiction book in America: Fifty Shades Freed, the final entry of the "erotic trilogy."

On this week's episode of The Jennifer Love Hewitt Handjob Hour The Client List , Love's character Riley cleared the snorkel of one of her youngest clients yet: a third-year law student. In the past, I'd complained about the lack of erection realness on this otherwise delightful romp of a show (actually, it's kind of a drag when she isn't jerking dudes off, because I don't care about her absentee husband unless she's hallucinating that she's jerking him off, which she periodically does). However, on last night's show, a guy pitched a tent and the results were as gritty as you'd expect from a show about happy endings on Lifetime.

Australian mining magnate and National Living Treasure Clive Palmer has made formal his intentions to construct a near-exact replica of the Titanic, and sail it from England to North America in late 2016.

Hell hath no fury... like a female dentist scorned?