R.A. Dickey, a starting pitcher for the New York Mets, earned his 20th win of the season two nights ago. Now everyone is talking about him, and you are standing off to the side smiling and nodding like an idiot because you thought the Met was a museum. You're a nerd, it's fine, but we wanted to help you out: Here, Deadspin's Jack Dickey (no relation, just obsession) breaks down the wonder that is R.A. Dickey's 2012 season.

Now that Obama's weighed in, just about everyone on Earth has spoken up about bizarre Innocence of Muslims trailer that sparked violent protests in the Middle East. Everyone, that is, except the man largely believe to be responsible for it: the 55-year-old Coptic Christian former gas station owner named Nakoula Basseley Nakoula. We may not hear from him for a while, now that he's been imprisoned for parole violations and could face up to three years in prison.

Miley Cyrus is in talks to play Bonnie in a Lifetime movie about Bonnie & Clyde. (NOT the '03 Hov and Bey version.)

Gawker is on a quest to determine the most racist city in America. Your contributions are vital to the cause. Please add your insights in the discussion system below. Or if you'd like to nominate another city please send an email here. Today... Cincinnati, OH.

Adults interrogating children about Big Person Issues on camera is a completely original concept that was definitely invented by the Internet. But since it's been a gnarly Friday afternoon, let's cleanse our eyeballs with this short clip of kids talking about the 2012 presidential election at a Brooklyn block party. You will learn that the White House is located . . . at the beach! You vote by . . . getting some cardboard! The one character all the children of the world would unanimously vote for . . . is Spongebob!

Earlier this week, Sotheby's auctioned off nearly 1,000 items from the estate of socialite and philanthropist Brooke Astor (she of the famously monstrous son). Because rich people's used items are worth even more than other rich people think they are, the sale pulled in millions more than expected—almost twice as much, in fact—for a grand total of $18.8M. Now that the auctioneer's gavel has dropped, let's all gawp in astonishment at how much rich people are willing to pay for some truly weird second-hand junk:

High school students around the country are bellyaching that not enough food is being served during lunch following the institution of new limits on portion size.

So, Fox News has, excruciatingly, just broadcast live video of a man committing suicide after a car chase. Fox anchor Shep Smith said afterwards that the network was on a five-second delay, but that the video got through regardless. A network technician being too slow on the button is not the real issue here. The real issue is that car chases aren't worthy of live television (and this might be the thing that brings them to an end).

Yesterday, Gawker received a tip regarding a bizarre episode Amanda Bynes had Wednesday night in a New York bakery. It began, as many rips from sanity do, with a specialty cupcake. It ended with a firefighter threatening to break down a bathroom door.

In our piece last week about Amanda Palmer and the nearly non-existent accountability practices of Kickstarter, we briefly touched on the infamous Kickstarter project of one Josh Dibb. Dibb, a member of ballyhooed Baltimore band Animal Collective, infamously collected more than $25,000 three years ago to do a music project in Africa. Almost three years later, none of the donors to Dibb's project have received any of the rewards they were promised.

Shepard Smith's face in this photo tells the story about this awful situation: Here he's seen immediately after Fox News had aired a car chase (live, without a delay) that ended with a suspect shooting himself in the head. Immediately after, they cut to a commercial about mesothelioma.

Scientology officials are apparently rushing to scrub any mention of Sons of Anarchy star Johnny Lewis from the website of their highly controversial drug rehab program Narconon.

Typical Florida political story of the day: an answering machine captured a call (embedded below) from a volunteer with the Republican Party of Clay County, FL, who was reaching out to potential voters with several important lies about the upcoming presidential election.

The resident Gawker therapist, Anonymous, is a licensed therapist who treats many different patients, but specializes in teens and couples therapy. After many years in the field, Anonymous has lots of stories and insight to share. We'll be publishing some of them here. Today: the tricky sexual tensions that sometimes develop between therapists and patients.

Following a recent segment on Piers Morgan where President Ahmadinejad—leader of the not-so-free world—basically said that Israel should be "wiped off the map" and homosexuality is The Most Disgusting Thing Ever, SNL's Fred Armisen made an appearance as Fake Mahmoud Ahmadinejad last night. Let's be honest though, no one would be shocked to learn that Ahmadinejad actually plays "Jew or Homosexual" for money. Except instead of money they use nuclear weapons.

Should it be legal to pay your friend to do your jail sentence for you? Sure, worked for this guy.

Four for whoever leaked this behind-the-scenes look at a just-for-fun rap-through of math enthusiast / bad-ass MC Kevin Gnapoor's well-quoted Winter Talent Show rap from the 2004 cult film Mean Girls, attended by Amy Poehler, Lindsay Lohan, and screenwriter Tina Fey.

Yesterday a photograph made the rounds on the internet purporting to show Bad Brains frontman H.R. and Brooke Shields sitting together on a couch, with Shields leaning over and lighting what appeared to be a marijuana pipe. Which would be amazing. A spokesperson for Shields quickly denied that it's her. But Bad Brains' management has issued a statement to Gawker claiming that the photo indeed shows H.R. and Shields getting high together in 1983.

Looper, a futuristic movie about time travel, believes that children are our future and openly shares that old-fashioned sentiment. That may be the funniest paradox in Rian Johnson's new film. Others are less amusing.

The best of several hilarious moments in Christina Aguilera's "Your Body" video occurs at its 2:20 mark, when she pulls a handsome man she just played pool with into a bar bathroom stall and unleashes blue paint on him...somehow? I do not know what we are to glean from this. Is she sick? A squirter? Does she pee blue and thick? Is she really bad at graffiti?