Now a few months after the birth of her child, Snooki showed up for an interview with Access Hollywood this afternoon where she chatted with the hosts about her crossover from "fist pumping to breast pumping." When Kit Hoover asked why people were surprised by the Jersey Shore star's taking to motherhood, Snooki responded flatly: "Because they're assholes." Which slipped past the 7 second delay, much to the hosts' dismay.

TMZ interviewed Lark Voorhies/Lisa Turtle, and she talks like she writes: superfluous commas, fake words, the whole bit.

Welcome to Thatz Not Okay, a regular column in which I school inquiring readers on what is and is not okay. Please send your questions to caity.weaver@gawker.com with the subject "Thatz Not Okay."

Today, Psy performed "Gangnam Style" on The View, and I bet at least one member of its mature audience thought while waving her glowstick, "What is this 'open condom style,' and am I a hussy if I enjoy this nice foreign man's song about it?"

You should know better than to take fitness advice from the New York Times. The latest reason: their story today entitled, "Why Women Can't Do Pull-Ups." Women: you can do pull-ups. Do not believe the hype.

A 15-year-old Tottenville High School student who committed suicide yesterday afternoon at the Huguenot Staten Island Railway station was apparently the victim of ceaseless verbal abuse from classmates that followed her right up to the moment she jumped in front of a subway train.

Kiki's over, kids. The Scissor Sisters announced an "indefinite hiatus" at their show last night in London.

M83 have released the video for "Steve McQueen," off their year-old Hurry Up, We're Dreaming album. The fan-directed video is the winner of a contest the band held. That's some smooth movement from the inanimate toys that glide around video — impressive for a non-professional clip.

It only took W. Axl Rose 20 years to show up for last night's live televised interview on Jimmy Kimmel Live, which seems about right after the decade the Guns N' Roses lizard required to record Chinese Democracy. Axl's extreme tardiness was apparently the only one of his million idiosyncrasies Kimmel was allowed to mention—and it became a recurring punchline—there was no talk of Slash or the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame or Lana Del Rey or where Our Man Rose dwindled away those missing years. Instead, they talked about Axl's political leanings ("Obama"), his stint managing a Tower Records, and how he's medicating a recent cold ("I'm on a bunch of different things—legal, illegal").

The New York Times Style section is the most purposely loathsome newspaper section in America and should generally be avoided at all costs. But if you must read it, why not make a game out of it?

"I wish we could have an honest and respectful dialogue about these complicated issues," Tina Fey told attendees at last night's Center for Reproductive Rights Inaugural Gala. "But it seems like we can't right now."

Ho-lee shit. No one believed Jessica P. when she told everyone in AP Calc that Conor Kennedy would be hers by Fall Formal, but it looks like that bitch somehow managed to pull it off: Us Weekly reports that Taylor Swift and Conor Kennedy have broken up.

Yesterday, Gawker received an impassioned email from a Mt. Lebanon (Pa.) High student concerning the school's proposed "grinding" ban. (If you are not sure what "grinding" is, you'll find out in detail shortly.) The letter was so convincing that we asked to republish it in full, and the student complied, so long as they remain anonymous, lest the school administration attempt to suppress Mt. Lebanon's one true Grinder Crusader. We salute the student's important cause.

Following Donald Trump's game-changing October Surprise — a decidedly unserious promise to donate $5 million to Obama's charity of choice if the president releases his college and passport records to Trump's "satisfaction" — Guardian writer Adam Gabbatt thought it would be only fair to ask Trump to release his own college and passport records, so he phoned up Trump's special counsel, Trump Organization executive VP Michael Cohen.

Continuing her "we're real human people with real human blood" talk-show tour, Ann Romney stopped by Rachael Ray's show today.

Last night, Lifetime debuted the first two episodes of The Houstons: On Our Own, the latest chapter in the year-long public grieving of the death of Whitney Houston. The series features Gary Houston (Whitney's brother), Pat Houston (Gary's wife and Whitney's manager/best friend), Rayah Houston (Gary and Pat's daughter), Cissy Houston (Whitney and Gary's mother) and, most voyeuristically, the (by nearly all reports) troubled daughter of Whitney and Bobby Brown, Bobbi-Kristina Brown.

Efforts to negatively impact Chick-fil-A's business in the aftermath of anti-gay comments made by the company's president appear to have backfired rather tremendously in favor of the fast food chain as it managed to exceed last year's third-quarter numbers in both consumer use and market share.

On last night's Couples Therapy, Courtney Stodden was asked to change her distracting, kid-in-a-Hollywood Boulevard-candy-store-slash-sex-shop style of dressing. Here was her response:

Far more people don't claim the unemployment they're eligible for than scam the system. It's much like "voter fraud."

Few details have been released so far, but here is what is known: FBI agents arrested a 28-year-old NYPD officer from Queens yesterday, and charged him with "conspiracy to kidnap, cook, and eat women."