Mile-Wide Tornado Hits Oklahoma City Suburb, Killing at Least 51
Cord Jefferson · 05/20/13 04:58PM
A massive, mile-wide tornado touched down in Moore, Oklahoma Monday afternoon, killing at least 51 people, including 20 children. A reporter from local news station KFOR supposedly called it "the biggest, most destructive tornado in the history of the world," and estimated it was two to three times the magnitude of the massive tornados that hit Oklahoma in 1999.
Creepy Auction Offers Chance to Be Servant for Downton Abbey Actor
Caity Weaver · 05/20/13 04:50PM
Everyone, from the dandiest Diddy to the poorest party spangler’s daughter loves Downton Abbey. Every week, we gather ‘round our television sets to watch our favorite characters die. “Why can’t I be a servant in the post-Edwardian era?” we cry as we watch the sallow-cheeked wait staff eat up screen time that should be devoted to the Grantham family’s glamorous problems. “Oh,” we gasp, when Lady Mary emerges in yet another devastating satin gown, “I wish I were a maid!”
Bat Mitzvah Chaperone Unleashes Hell on Schoolkids Over Wayward M&M
Neetzan Zimmerman · 05/20/13 04:29PMHamilton Nolan · 05/20/13 04:01PM
Talk Show Host Drinks Breast Milk Directly from the Source [NSFW]
Neetzan Zimmerman · 05/20/13 03:39PMDead California Cop Faces Prison For Rape, Kidnapping
Ken Layne · 05/20/13 02:57PMJann Wenner's Kid Is the New Head of RollingStone.com
Hamilton Nolan · 05/20/13 02:46PMMayoral Candidate Charged for Defacing Signs with (Weak) Pussy Joke
Caity Weaver · 05/20/13 02:33PMPistachios Are the Fifth-Best Nut
Hamilton Nolan · 05/20/13 02:10PMUnemployed Woman Blames Lack of Work on Being 'Too Attractive'
Neetzan Zimmerman · 05/20/13 02:09PMTom Scocca · 05/20/13 02:07PM
Surgeons at the Fourth Military Medical University in Xi'an, China, say they transplanted a genetically modified piece of pig liver into a Tibetan macaque this month, according to the state-run China Daily. The gene-altered pig-monkey was reportedly in stable condition at the army-affiliated research facility.
Vigils Continue for Mark Carson, Murdered in Anti-Gay NYC Shooting
Cord Jefferson · 05/20/13 02:01PM
More than 100 mourners turned up on Saturday night to a candlelight vigil for Mark Carson, the 32-year-old gay man shot and killed by a homophobe early Saturday morning in New York City. Carson's murder, which is being treated as a hate crime, is the latest and most violent in a recent string of anti-gay attacks in the city, a place whose progressive leanings have yet to fully overpower a resilient streak of homophobia.
Nutella Maker Shuts Down Fan 'Holiday' Dedicated to Buying Nutella
Neetzan Zimmerman · 05/20/13 01:00PMSeamless Made Fun of My Dead Cat and Now It's Merging with GrubHub
Caity Weaver · 05/20/13 12:33PM
Seamless and GrubHub, two nearly identical online food-ordering companies whose business model consists of providing a service that is already available for free, announced Monday that they would be merging into one giant online food-ordering hydra. The new company, which has not yet settled on a name, will enable and promote social anxiety in 500 U.S. cities by eliminating the traumatic element of "human verbal interaction" from pizza delivery. The co-founder and CEO of GrubHub will serve as the CEO of the new Sterling Cooper Draper Seamless Grubhub. The CEO of Seamless will serve as president. If your cat dies, the new organization will probably start a twitter fight with you about it.
Camille Dodero · 05/20/13 12:21PM
What a Tree Looks Like After Being Stripped Naked by Nature's Fury
Neetzan Zimmerman · 05/20/13 12:02PMQuacks of All Political Persuations Fight Fluoridation In Portland
Adrian Chen · 05/20/13 11:44AM
In 2013 one can have many legitimate beefs with the medical and scientific establishment, but fluoridated water, like immunization, is not one of them. Still, it appears increasingly likely that a Left-Right coalition of dedicated fear-mongers will defeat a measure in Portland this week to fluoridate its water supply and help keep kids' teeth from falling out.
Unemployment Stories, Vol. 35: 'I Can't Really Afford to Be Alive'
Hamilton Nolan · 05/20/13 11:28AM
In most states, the unemployment rate is coming down, ever so slowly. Still, nearly 12 million Americans are officially unemployed, and millions more have dropped out of the labor force entirely. Each week, we bring you true stories of unemployment, straight from the unemployed. This is what's happening out there.







