A pair of teenage girls who were arrested on suspicion of robbery in late March could have possibly talked their way out of it — had they not snapped a selfie of themselves dressed as robbers and holding a knife just before allegedly committing the crime.

Two women who had just been rescued after getting lost while hiking through a state park were found dead inside a submerged vehicle that was accidentally driven into the water.

Customers at a downtown Edmonton, Alberta, Tim Hortons were more than a little suspicious when staff members told them their coffee was free of charge thanks to a mysterious stranger.

Finally: Weiner.

"Slow your roll," American booty-wipers: have you been feeling a bit light in the tush, lately? You sure have. Because Big Toilet Paper is engaged in a systematic program of giving you less for your money.

An Arizona woman was so disturbed at finding a chicken foot in a package of chicken breasts at her local Safeway that she tweeted a photo and alerted the media.

A Swedish lawmaker named Lars Ohly wanted to show off his new tattoo on Instagram. He didn't realize until publication that his genitals were also in the photograph.

Creed's Scott Stapp on Trayvon Martin: "Yes, civil rights for all is in the top 10, don’t get me wrong, but it should not distract us from socialism and governmental abuse of power which is the reality of the Obama administration and DC today. We have to WAKE UP~ Love you all. In the studio wrapping up my new album."

The entertainment at the LA Sheriff's Department "Sheriffs Day Luncheon" yesterday was a stand-up comedian who reportedly told lots of racist jokes, and then received a plaque of appreciation from the LA Sheriff. Yes? And? Sounds like they chose the entertainment perfectly.

"I don’t think there’s anyone in Congress who has a stronger belief in minority rights than I do," Rand Paul tells Yahoo!. Civil-rights hero and Georgia congressman John Lewis might disagree.

As an experiment, Noah Oppenheim, a marine biology graduate student at the University of Maine, attached a waterproof, infrared camera to the head of a young lobster. As evening set in, he saw sights that cannot be unseen (but can be seen by you in the video below). Lobsters eating lobsters.

After getting lost and hurting her ankle during a Mount St. Helens hike with her teen daughter, a Texas woman phoned the local emergency services to come and save them.

Mohammed Brahmi, a member of Tunisia's opposition People's Movement party, was shot and killed on Thursday morning, possibly by Islamic extremists. Brahmi had been among those writing a new constitution for Tunisia, the first country to topple its government in the "Arab Spring."

The violent derailing of a passenger train in northwest Spain last night killed at least 78 and injured more than 140. Video of the accident shows the first several cars of the train lurching onto their sides at high speed as it exits a curve:

Jason Sudeikis announced tonight on Letterman that he's leaving SNL. He's the third male cast member to leave the show since last season, following Bill Hader and Fred Armisen. Seth Meyers, set to replace Jimmy Fallon when he jumps to the helm of the "Tonight Show," will also leave sometime over the next season.

Lance Armstrong, the doping-bribing-banned-from-the-sport former hero of cycling, has filed a motion to dismiss in a federal lawsuit, claiming that he didn't defraud his sponsor because the USPS should have known he was cheating the whole time.

According to the Wall Street Journal, introverts would be happier if they just pretended to be extroverts.

A stripper just won a lawsuit against Nebraska police who confiscated over $1,000,000 in $10,000 bundles tied with hair ties after a routine traffic stop.

A drilling rig in the Gulf of Mexico is on fire after a natural gas blowout. NBC reports that 47 people were rescued from the blowout, which occurred 55 miles offshore.