To reach the Federation of Black Cowboys headquarters at Cedar Lane Stables, you take the A train for about an hour out of Manhattan to the Grant Avenue station in Howard Beach, walk a mile past park-and-ride lots and construction sites and a truck selling Polish sausage, then look for the wooden rail fencing around a long and narrow stretch of trees and trailers alongside Linden Boulevard. For two decades, until the city closed the stables this year, these 26 acres of pasture, trees, and western-themed corrals provided a place for city kids to learn to ride a horse or see a rodeo.

Back in April, a high school in Florida fired its English teacher after learning that she was moonlighting as an "eyecandy model" for an obscure promotion company called XXXTremeVisionRadio.

You, my fellow godless, sarcastic, coastal elites, may recently have heard something about a reality TV show called Duck Dynasty. Specifically, one of its main cast members said some homophobic and racist shit that earned him an indefinite suspension from the show. The controversy, of course, has generated stupid reactions the usual idiots. But let's go back a step, because you're probably thinking to yourself, "What the fuck is a Duck Dynasty?" Let me explain.

Consumer Reports bought and tested more than 300 chicken breasts. "More than half of the chicken breasts were tainted with fecal contaminants," and two thirds of them tested positive for E. coli.

Last night, the final episode of Barbara Walters' Most Fascinating People aired (she's retiring in 2014), and she seemed completely ready to be done. She wasn't nearly as goofy as last year, and her resting face is a scowl. Babs is tired.

What's killing Obamacare this week? Stock photo models in stupid night clothes.

A Seattle man who attempted to rob passengers aboard a city bus didn't get very far before he was jumped by several riders, overpowered, and disarmed.

Isn't that adorable?

Sen. Ted Cruz tells the Texas Tribune that he hasn't yet fulfilled a vow to renounce his Canada citizenship; the process "should be completed sometime next year, but I don't have an exact time frame." Right. Lazy Canadians.

Welcome to The 12 Days of Thatz Not Okay, a special holiday edition of a regular column in which I school inquiring readers on what is and is not okay. Check back tomorrow for our next seasonal installment. As always, please send your questions (max: 200 words) to caity.weaver@gawker.com with the subject "Thatz Not Okay."

New York Times Magazine editor Hugo Lindgren will be leaving at the end of the year. Who's his replacement? The Times revealed today: we're stalling! Stalling!

In a last-ditch effort to find someone — anyone — to spend Christmas with him, 85-year-old James Gray turned to the want ads.

America's embrace of the death penalty makes us a gross anomaly in the developed world. The good news is that we seem to be growing less and less fond of it. The newest numbers are (relatively) encouraging.

Al Goldstein, the publisher of the pioneering hard-core pornography magazine Screw, died Thursday at the age of 77.

In a surprise bipartisan move Thursday, the Republican-led House passed a plan that could make it easier to transfer most of the remaining 160 U.S. terror detainees from their prison in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, to other locations overseas.

Fox Business Network financial holler-er and New York Post columnist Charles Gasparino has not been paying very close attention to the Bernie Madoff case. Which does not stop him from writing about it.

It started with a televised car chase and ended with the televised execution of an unarmed mentally ill man by three Los Angeles police officers.

Whole Foods says it will stop selling bottom-of-the-milk-barrel Greek yogurt brand Chobani in order to make room for yogurts that "are organic, or don't contain genetically modified ingredients." Yeah. And that don't taste like paste. Please, eat the right kind of Greek yogurt in 2014.

Long story short, Jennifer Lawrence used to own a lot of butt plugs. I mean, a lot of them.

Monday morning, Target confirmed reports that criminals attacked its customer information system earlier this year, stealing credit card and personal data from about 40 million customers. The theft began Thanksgiving week, just before Black Friday, and continued until December 15.