A seven-year-old girl showed up on Norway's Got Talent this week and unleashed a whiskey-soaked deep-blues rendition of Billie Holiday's "Gloomy Sunday."

A little landlocked city in Florida is so outrageously corrupt that state officials are trying to abolish it.

It's time (flat, circle, we're trapped in it) for the reckoning: the True Detective season finale airs tonight.

The New York Post will have to settle or try their case: their lawyers just lost a motion to dismiss the libel action brought against the paper for running a front-page photograph wrongfully identifying Salaheddin Barhoum and Yassine Zaimi as the Boston Marathon bombers.

[via Noisey]

This beats whatever story from elementary school you always tell people: Yesterday, Kansas City seventh grader Kush Sharma defeated fifth grader Sophia Hoffman in a spelling bee that lasted two days over the course of two weeks.

A new opiate called Zohydro, developed by Zogenix and approved by the FDA, will enter California markets this month, despite the protests of a number of doctors and experts. Zohydro is ten times more potent than Vicodin.

If you weren't wired thousands of dollars this weekend, it's probably because you didn't ask a Twitter teen who said he or she was giving away a fortune to whomever wanted it. Or, it's because everyone was faking it.

Another day, another Rob Ford gaffe. The tweet has since been corrected.

Though most of us look to March for confirmation that spring is arriving, a select few use it as a reminder to get drunker than ever before. At the University of Amherst, the yearly "Blarney Blowout" was interrupted when law enforcement intervened, arresting 73 drunks, with 4 officers injured in the process.

A gangster named Alien (née James Franco) put it best when he said "Spriinng break, spriiing breakkk. Spring break foreveerrrr," and many young coeds would agree. Due to the harsh winter that a large area of the US has been facing, the number of Spring Break attendees in Florida this year is supposed to skyrocket.

With nearly 48 hours passed since Malaysia Airlines Flight 370 disappeared en route to Beijing, the Boeing 777 has yet to be discovered. As investigators from numerous countries work to piece together what happened, here is everything we still do not know.

Everyone's favorite GIRL Lena Dunham was on comedy variety program SNL last night as a first-time host. She wasn't bad, though her opening monologue and two separate sketches referenced her show's gratuitous nudity and the sound of her voice was just a smidge grating. Nothing out of the usual.

And on the third day of CPAC there were women.

Speaking on Skype from the Ecuadorian Embassy in London, Julian Assange interacted with a crowd of SXSW festival attendees today in Austin regarding the NSA, Barack Obama's weak policies on civilian privacy, and the frailty of security reporting.

Something like this was bound to pop up in the wake of the acclaimed documentary Blackfish: a California state assemblyman named Richard Bloom has proposed a bill that would ban orcas from being used for performative reasons.

Amtrak is now accepting applications for its hashtagged residency program. You get to sleep on a train, basically.

Wearing a necklace only the bling ring could love, Minnesota Rep. Michele Bachmann told a crowd of rapt CPAC members that "we will have a woman for president, just the right one." The conference's closing events coincide with today's celebration of International Women's Day.

After two streakers were caught grazing the lush world wonder of Machu Picchu in Cusco, Peru, and while a bohemian low-level Adam Duritz chronicles his unclothed Latin American jaunt, many are asking: could getting buckwild in your birthday suit be the next trend in travel?