Photo: AP

Recalling an old joke, Donald Trump released a statement celebrating his decisive wins over nobody in West Virginia and Nebraska on Tuesday, adding, “and by such large margins!”

“It is a great honor to have won both West Virginia and Nebraska, especially by such massive margins,” said the man running unopposed for the Republican nomination. “My time spent in both states was a wonderful and enlightening experience for me.”

Never one to rest on his laurels, however, Trump said he remained focussed on the tough battles against no one ahead.

“Likewise, my time spent last week with the great people of Oregon will hopefully lead to another victory,” said Trump.

Considering the prominent endorsements nobody has already received, Trump might need all the hope he can get.