Prince William Definitely Got Laid Last Night
Something about the Olympics really does it for Prince William and the Artist Formerly Known as Kate Middleton. These two have been all over the games and all over each other since the events kicked off last week.
On Thursday, the couple took in the team sprint cycling competition, in which Team Great Britain earned a gold medal.
GB Cyclists!!! BIPFOUKKENCYCLIN BRILLIANCE! Go Host Nation!
— Samuel L. Jackson (@SamuelLJackson) August 2, 2012
Following the race's dramatic conclusion, Prince William literally dropped his trousers and began having sex with his wife in bold daylight right there in the middle of the Olympic stadium, or, anyway, he hugged her.
But this was not a chaste Obama kiss-cam moment.
This was a full body grope by a man who is finna get laid.
See? Look at that man. That man is getting laid tonight.
This guy too, I guess. Looks like everybody's getting laid.
Even before the hug, the Duke and Duchess were basically a Ja Rule featuring Ashanti music video of thug love flirtiness.
Here they can be seen exchanging sexy secrets, playing with one another's oversized accessories, and rubbing their knees to orgasm.
They even made Prince Harry feel like an awkward third wheel, and that's a hard boy to embarrass.
At a different event on Thursday, the couple spent a lot of time doing the wave (or, as it is apparently known in Great Britain "The Mexican Wave"), which Kate in particular seems to enjoy because she was raised in a barn by party planners.
Her timing's not great though. There's a whole series of shots where she and William are the only two people in their section with their hands in the air; sometimes just her alone. This means either that the wave has not yet made its way to them from Tijuana or that it has already passed through, and Kate, refusing to let it go, is ridin' it out to sea.
Anyway. Thanks for having the whole word over, kids. Have fun doin' it.
[Images via Getty]