Earlier today, a princess was granted a wish, and that wish was to blog. As it turns out, sometimes, if you truly believe in yourself, dreams really can come true.

Kate Middleton has bangs, you guys. And they’re all over the place. Royals, they’re just like us. Minus that £1,245 Ralph Lauren shirtdress.

Kate Middleton gave birth to a baby girl on Saturday, and today the world finally learned her name.

Of all the babies that were born on Saturday—and there were several—one of the babies was a royal baby, which, as these things go, is a pretty good kind of baby to be. This particular royal baby was born to Kate, Duchess of Cambridge, and is a girl.

Two British tourists received the thrill of a lifetime Monday night when they were allowed to interrupt Beyoncé and Jay Z's private conversation as the Carters took in a basketball game in Brooklyn.

The British royal family confirmed Monday that the chilling sequel to 2013's "Royal Baby" is scheduled to hit Britain in April of next year. Also Kate Middleton still can't stop throwing up. It's worth it, though, for her beautiful family.

Kensington Palace confirmed Monday that the Duchess of Cambridge is expecting her second child, which the media are tentatively calling New Royal Baby. According to the official statement, the Duchess is once again experiencing Hyperemesis Gravidarum, the severe morning sickness that plagued her first pregnancy, and has already been forced to cancel a planned appearance because of it.

Once upon a time the forebears of Kate Middleton's family were all coalminers, roadsweepers, and prisoners. Today, their descendants are princesses and marshmallow salesmen. The potential impact of a diet rich in Vitamin E on your family's fortunes cannot be overstated.

The Daily Telegraph ran a front-page story this morning about England's attempts to teach nursery-school kids "fundamental British values" to protect them from radical indoctrination. After all, you wouldn't want them to end up like the poor baby in the photo, pictured with two dangerous religious extremists.

Kate Middleton and her double tufts of hair in body sacks, Prince William and porkpie Prince George, have been living in Medieval squalor at their Kensington Palace apartment. With no running water and tons of asbestos infiltrating their happy home, the repairs on the palace are reportedly going to cost UK taxpayers nearly £4 million.

Catherine Middlebum, Duchess of Dayumbridge, future Queen of Assland, may have dressed a little formally for the beach during last month's royal tour of Australia, but a new photo published over the weekend in the German tabloid newspaper Bild suggests that anything goes on the helicopter pad.

The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge had a lot of fun in Australia on Wednesday, lightly placing their fingers on records under the close supervision of a professional disc jockey. After being reassured several times they had not been party to criminal conduct, the royal couple likely returned to their hotel and made real wild, freaky love until 4 p.m., when it was time to dress for their next event.

A fly landed on my nose.

This month, powerful baby Prince George performs his first official royal duty—an inspection of British penal colonies and their outlying areas—as he and his parents, the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, spend three weeks traveling across Australia and New Zealand. During this time, Gawker.com will publish a selection of entries from his minder Kate Middleton's travel journals.

Kate, the Duchess of Cambridge, holds Prince George during a visit to Plunket nurse and parents group in Wellington, New Zealand, on Wednesday. Plunket is a nonprofit group that provides care for New Zealand children and families. Image via Marty Melville, Pool/AP.

This month, powerful baby Prince George performs his first official royal duty—an inspection of British penal colonies and their outlying areas—as he and his parents, the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, spend three weeks traveling across Australia and New Zealand. During this time, Gawker.com will publish a selection of entries from his minder Kate Middleton's travel journals.

[Kate, Duchess of Cambridge, presents Domhnall the Irish Wolfhound with a shamrock during a visit to the 1st Battalion Irish Guards at the St. Patrick's Day Parade in Aldershot, England, on Monday. Image via Kirsty Wigglesworth/AP.]

Kate Middleton, Duchess of Cambridge, Countess of Strathearn, Earl of Grantham, Downton of Abbey, was made to formally reject the devil on Sunday, when she attended the christening of her new godchild.

Kate Middleton is likely to be the first member of the British Royal Family since 1649 to be executed by beheading in the wake of public outcry after she was photographed twirling her hair and smiling at the national Remembrance Sunday ceremony in London.