Your baby: it has some issues. Let's be real. Its baby skin is... not so perfect. Nothing you'd want to be seen in public with. Your baby's beauty reflects on you. The good news: your baby's hideousness is nothing that hundreds of dollars worth of beauty products can't temporarily fix.

Today's New York Times Style Section "Story Ostensibly About Some Emerging Lifestyle Trend But Whose Actual Subtext Is: 'Revel in Your Hatred of These People'" is about people who buy lots of beauty products, for their babies. Baby skin care, for example. Your baby's skin: isn't it worth enough to spend lots of money to protect? What sort of horrible mother are you? More horrible than this person, that's for sure:

Zoe Schaeffer, 35, who lives in Los Angeles and has a mothering blog, Macaroon Original, said she spends $150 to $200 a month on a variety of natural lines for her three children, 3 months to 4 years old.

Ms. Schaeffer, who describes herself as a "product junkie," said that her curiosity to try new beauty lines extended to her children when she became a mother. "I am not necessarily into natural lines myself," she said. "But it was important for me to find pure and nontoxic products for my kids because I feel like their skin is so new."

Zoe, Los Angeles, Mommy Blogger, "Product Junkie." Yes, this all sounds about right, just as expected. By that I mean she is a mom who cares enough to give her baby's new skin the very best. Just as you wouldn't get in your car without spraying "new car scent" in it, why would you allow your baby to walk around with hundreds of dollars worth of good smeared on its epidermis? Parents these days need to be responsible about shit. You moms out there who don't love your babies enough to cover them in only the finest of Parisian concoctions need to take a good look at yourselves, rather than always being like "What a fucking psycho every last lady quoted in this story sounds like, why the hell don't they just stop talking to the New York Times Style Section forever, like sane people?"

Don't hate just because your baby is ugly.

[NYT. Photo via]