Donald Trump only picks winners, according to Donald Trump. He is so busy picking winners that he has no time to hang out with losers. So... that's why he's joining destroyed presidential candidate Michele Bachmann for her campaign's "tele-townhall" today? A winning move, by all measures.

What's a "tele-townhall"? The Hill explains:

GOP presidential contender Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-Minn.) will participate in a "tele-townhall" with New York businessman Donald Trump on Monday.

"This is an incredible opportunity for you and everyone from Team Bachmann to hear from a businessman who knows firsthand that Barack Obama's failed policies are crippling our nation's job creators," said Bachmann in an email to supporters.

"Donald Trump and I will discuss the state of the race, along with the challenges and opportunities that lie ahead," she added.

Okay, so, a tele-townhall is a "conference call" but with a loud orange cartoonish television asshole participating, got it.

[Image via AP]