The high school years have always been fraught with social peril, and middle school is a time many remember for instilling a lifelong sense of mortifying awkwardness. Fine, but what about toddlers? Can we give them an inferiority complex, too?

"Babies and toddlers have big bellies, and skinny jeans are not for people with big bellies," says Ms. Lane, a 29-year-old museum marketing director. "But they still work."

Yes, the fashion industry has found a way to convince parents to buy skinny jeans for their two year-olds. But the fashion industry can't do everything, you know. You babies could stand to lose a few pounds. They're called "skinny" jeans for a reason, kids. Watching Spongebob and sucking down Gogurts is not doing anything to help your profiles in the playground.

Today's bulimic three year-old is tomorrow's teenage Botox user. Fashion is important! As is consumerism!