You're well aware that your child is already using his or her cell phone for healthy amounts of sexting. But did you know that texting can also make your teen into a milquetoast big baby mother's darling?

Schmancy Riverdale Country School did a little experiment where kids go two whole days without texting. And just as draining a lake reveals the bodies hidden therein, these text-free days inadvertently exposed the fact that kids in eighth grade are still suckling on their mamas' metaphorical teats, electronically:

"Kids will do poorly on a test, and more often than not, right away they'll go into the bathroom and text their mom and dad," [a teacher] said...

How many times during the school day does she usually text her mom? About 10, Kayla said; a friend nodded in agreement.

Uh what? Hey nerd baby with your nerd mom on your nerd phone, why don't your call your mom to come to school and wipe your bottom, and whatnot, etc.? Where are all the bullies who should be taking care of this behavior? They are texting their moms, that's where.
[NYT. Pic via]