Can Bill Clinton Charm Kim Jong Il?
Remember Laura Ling and Euna Lee, the journalists for Al Gore's Current.TV locked up in a North Korean prison for crossing that country's border? Well, since Gore and Hillary haven't been successful securing their release, they're sending in The Closer.
CNN, citing "a source with detailed knowledge of the former president's movements," (Insert your own joke here.) said tonight that Bill Clinton is traveling to North Korea to negotiate the release of Ling and Lee. Clinton's visit to the rogue totalitarian country comes at a time when North Korea's done just about everything in their power to piss of the United States, its Asian neighbors and the world at large, with batshit-crazy missile launches and outlandish threats to develop an arsenal of nuclear weapons to annihilate their enemies. It's also been widely rumored that North Korea's cuckoo despot ruler, Kim Jong Il, is presently gravely ill. The last American cabinet official to visit North Korea, coincidentally, was former Clinton Secretary of State Madeline Albright.
On the face of things it seems that the United States of America probably has no better bullet in its diplomatic gun than Bill Clinton for handling situations like such as these, so sending him in seems to make all kinds of sense. However, it's hard not to think that if he's successful, he'll once again steal the spotlight from his long-suffering Number Twos, Al Gore and Hillary Clinton, but hey, whatever it takes, right? Maybe Bill can take Kim Jong Il for a spin on Ron Burkle's sex-jet, "Air Fuck One," to close the deal? Again, whatever it takes.