In Which We Attempt to Decipher Brad Pitt's Picture of Angelina Jolie Breastfeeding

If there's one thing Angelina Jolie loves even more than Hot Pockets, it's babies. Together with partner Brad Pitt, Jolie collects children as though they were Pokemon, though the self-sired birth of their recent Chosen Blobs has allowed Jolie to engage in one eye-opening new activity: breast-feeding on the cover of W magazine! We'll let the purple prose of the Daily Mail describe the tableau: "The Hollywood star sits with brunette locks tumbling over her shoulders, with the top of her blouse pulled down to expose her breast - which is somewhat covered by the tiny fingers which just reveal the presence of one of her suckling twins." Funny, we saw it a different way. Our analysis and the full picture, after the jump:

Clearly, Angelina Jolie has given birth to a three-fingered baby (or, possibly, Kristen Wiig). Though it's hard to believe two of Hollywood's most perfect parents could create a non-flawless child, at least there is hope. Angelina, meet new Bond girl Gemma Arterton — we hear she might have a few extra digits to spare.