Gwyneth Paltrow 'Owes It To Humanity' To Spawn Again
It has been many, many moons since Gwyneth Paltrow and Brad Pitt broke it off, but that doesn't mean that Gwyneth is immune to the jealousy that Angelina Jolie and her multi-national brood of infants inspires. In the new issue of Harper’s Bazaar, Paltrow tells the mag that, “I may force myself to [get pregnant] one more time because the result is so worth it...And also my [late] dad said to me that his only regret in life was that he had only two children and he didn't have more." Though we doubt Coldplay frontman Chris Martin finds these loving words inspiring when it comes to slipping into the sheets with his hooker-heeled wife, Paltrow seems to feel the Apocalypse will officially begin if he doesn't. You see, she’s just the best mother in the whole world (aside from Dina Lohan, that is), and “owes it to humanity” to produce another spawn. Also? Her late father was reincarnated as her hair,and chopping it off made her go “...aaah!” An explanation, after the jump:
As Gwyneth explains, "I was very, very attached to my hair. I grew it when I was pregnant. I still had hair from when my father was alive. I made it like a talisman. And then I was ready to let go of it, and so I chopped it off and ... aaah!" Anyone else find the dichotomy between explaining that your loved and adored father was somehow represented in your long stringy Rapunzel-like hair, and that one day you were just kind of like, "Eh! Guess it's time to say buh-bye" very, well, very Gwyneth Paltrow? But getting back to the case of her Jolie-envy, it seems that Martin may not even have to roll around with Paltrow after all — she's "open" to adoption just like every other famous woman in Hollywood, and seems to be implying that choosing not to adopt is pretty much like giving the middle finger to all the starving infants out there.