Lindsay Lohan's mom Dina faces "immediate arrest and imprisonment" if she doesn't show up in court this morning on charges she gets drunk in front of her kids, 11 and 14, and the she missed 15 of 29 court-ordered visitations, and showed up to one inebriated. Ex-husband Michael Lohan also threw in to the court filing that Dina is sometimes mean to her puppy — putting it in a kennel instead of letting Michael watch it — because he knows that will piss people off more than the child abuse or whatever. [R&M]
Meanwhile, Lohan is way too classy to be on her mother's reality show, and also too busy flashing her panties at the MTV movie awards in a desperate attempt to look like Marilyn Monroe. Tila Tequila wants Lohan to come out of the closet, because think of the moneymaking opportunities.
Tom Cruise likes to invite big powerful Hollywood men for a ride in the cockpit of his airplane. But only once they've memorized a sufficient number of homoerotic lines from Top Gun. [TMZ]
Jennifer Aniston's friend Courteney Cox has a husband who is eight years younger, so Aniston introduced Cox to her new boyfriend, John Mayer, who is nine years younger. In case it wasn't totally obvious she was trying to show off, Aniston also wore one of those tops where you can totally see her boobs.
Naomi Campbell reminded everyone that if Yves Saint Laurent had not gotten her onto the cover of French Vogue in the 1990s, she couldn't have have squander her massive opportunity to become a role model to girls worldwide. [Showbiz Spy]
Angelina Jolie comes to the same conclusion as much of the moviegoing public, declaring of husband Brad Pitt: "I don't see him as an actor." [E!]
Robert Downey Junior refused to post for a picture with Office and Get Smart star Steve Carell: "Whoa, whoa, whoa, what are you doing, cross-promoting?" [R&M]
