This Thanksgiving, as you add the last pat of butter to the mashed potatoes while trying to ignore your great uncle's comments about how your mother's like Crisco because she's fat in the can, be thankful that you're not Brad Pitt. So says Bonnie Fuller, who, in her latest HuffPo blog post, points out that she believes her own magazine's report about how strained things could be at the Pitt home in Missouri on Thursday!

"All the perks of stardom and $100 million in the bank can do nothing to diminish the fact that he'll be the man in the middle between Angelina Jolie and his mom, Jane Pitt... [who] has been publicly spotted several times dining, hugging, and even visiting her former daughter-in-law Jennifer Aniston at home, since the exes became exes. That in itself would qualify as monster-in-law material for lesser women. Then I'm sure Angelina got quite the earful from Brad's mom after she confessed to British Cosmopolitan that she took a wild trip to Disneyland while high on LSD."

Sure.

Fuller goes on to analyze hypothetical holiday scenarios involving Ashton and Demi ("What about [Kutcher's mom] Diane's dishes and silverware? Are they up to A list?"), Jake and Reese, and Jen and Ben. Okay, now we're totally convinced that it sucks to be them, for reasons besides 'Bonnie Fuller exists.'