North Korea Praises Pretty Ladies
It may be impolite and insensitive to probe the arts-and-leisure scene in war-torn Iraq, but there's no reason to think that the other segments of the Axis of Evil can't play the frivolous-amusements game with the best of 'em. Not only does suave sex kitten Mahmoud Ahmadinejad maintain a blog (infrequently updated but RSS-equipped); the Democratic People's Republic of Korea—"North Korea" to the capitalist running dogs—runs a charmingly Web 1.0 official news site off a Japanese server. And it even updates on the weekends!
So in the interest of getting the "she said" side of the he-said-she-said-whoops-nuclear-war "place" the world is in now, click through for some of today's top NoKo style stories.
- "Functions Held Abroad": from Russia to Peru to Egypt—okay, only in those places—people celebrated the Day of the Sun, a holiday honoring the bouffant-sporting dictator Kim Jong Il. Festivities included "film shows" of Korean flicks like "The Great Leader Comrade Kim Il Sung Meets Heads of State and Prominent Figures of Foreign Countries." "Figures from all walks of life" were present.
- "National Sporting Festival Closes": in Pyongyang, the Day of the Sun wasn't all arts & entertainment—there were also "many events including ball games and heavy games," with record-breaking performances in weight-lifting and archery. Awards included "rotating cups (?!), cups and medals" (note: no Oxford comma in the DPRK stylebook).
- In fashion "news," we learn that "Hoejang Jogori has been a favorite one of the Korean women from olden times." One what? One super awesome garment that "looks very smart and beautiful": a jacket with a colorfully trimmed collar, sleeves, and, um, "breast-ties." The writerof this puff piece can't seem to contain himself: "Spectacular are the women in the dress playing seesaw, swing, yut and other fold amusement games on holidays." Yeesh, we're getting a little hot under the breast-ties ourselves.
- Those are the only important things about North Korea.—SHANE "THE KEYHOLE" WILSON