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PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers, and are posted several times a week, so send them in often. Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line) and let everyone know about the time Jason Bateman's gay dog mounted your friend's bi-curious daschund on Runyon Canyon.

In today's episode: Alec Baldwin; Steven Spielberg; Sacha Baron Cohen and Isla Fischer; Ashton Kutcher; Daniel Craig; Joaquin Phoenix and Amanda Scheer Demme; Jack Osbourne; Jason Bateman; Britney Spears; Jessica Biel; Adam Brody; Nick Stahl; Andrea Anders; Carrie Underwood; Paris and Nicky Hilton, Omarion and Timbaland; Stavros Niarchos; Seth MacFarlane and Mike Henry; Michael Chiklis; Tatum Channing and Marcellas Reynolds; Paul Simon; Melora Hardin; MIichael Rapaport; Heidi Fleiss; Kal Penn; Joe Francis; Ian Ziering; Janice Dickinson and Jai Rodriguez; Lukas Rossi and Kendra Jade.

· i was working out in the downstairs area of the sherman oaks 24 hour fitness the morning of monday jan. 15 . i had noticed an older gray-haired guy on one of the two rowing machines rowing one-handed while on his cellphone. i made my way over to the other rowing machine and noticed right as i sat down that is was alec baldwin. he half smiled and kept on rowing (really poor technique, by the way). he did that for a while and then moved on to a couple of the weight machines. he must not go there very often since he had to ask one of the trainers where one of the ab machines is. and then he goes and makes a comment during his golden globe acceptance speech about just recovering from hernia surgery...

· saw steven spielberg at urban outfitters on the promenade buying a stack of hipster duds 4 his kid. cursing under his breath at the long line.

· Golden Globe watch 2007 the city is so busy due to the invasion of the celebrities. Saw SACHA BARON COHEN (aka Borat) and his adorable fiance ISLA FISCHER (aka the crazy chick from Wedding Crashers) at Joans On Third. They were so cute together, with what seems like a ten foot height difference between them. They came in, looked around and when they couldn't find a table they left. No muss, no fuss they seemed perfectly down to earth and disgustingly affectionate with one another.

· I saw Ashton Kutcher on an elevator in my building yesterday. I guess he has an office in the building or something.

When I walked into the elevator, he immediately covered his face with his hand, thinking that since I might, upon noticing it was him, would start a high-pitched scream saying I love him and want his man-sperm.

Anyway, he was talking to someone else in the elevator about what seemed like pre-planning an episode of Punk'd. He was asking "Where are we going to get them?" and his partner responded by saying that "her parents are from Chicago". So, any Chicago-parent-based actresses/singers, look out for Ashton!

· Weekend of 1/13. Two minus one at Equinox, West Hollywood.

Saturday. Daniel "007" Craig. The dude is cut. Working out hard. Brought in his own trainer. Good move. The trainer was doing everything 00 did. No lollygagging.

Sunday. Kevin Connelly. Came in for the "executive". Enough said.

· Last night (1/15) at Pace in Laurel Canyon. Pretty sure I saw Jack Osbourne walk in with a group of friends. Then later Amanda Demme dining with Joaquin Phoenix.

· Friday, 1/12 at Runyon Canyon, Jason Bateman's dog, a Griffon, tried to hump my friend's dog, a daschund. Both boy dogs. Jason didn't even try to apologize, just kept calling for his dog! He had a hoodie sweatshirt on and trying really hard not to be noticed. He's one of my favorite actors thanks to "Arrested Development" (RIP), so it's really too bad he's so snooty. When your dog tries to hump another dog on Runyan, the unspoken rule is you make eye contact with the owner and say, "Sorry". It's not like he's the only semi-famous actor up there! Still, he's cute, I forgive him.

· Friday 1/12: BRITNEY SPEARS at the Abbey. She was in that semi-private area next to the fireplace with a posse of gays. They were all drinking bottled water and there were Abbey staff surrounding her holding up trays trying to block people's views. Didn't work as she was in plain sight of everyone, but she looked happy and like she was having a good time. No paparazzi outside.

· I went to Tiger Heat last night (1-11), I was leaving the area called Heaven as I heard that Brit was arriving. I had to use the ladies' lounge with quite some urgency (broke the seal), so I only saw her overprocessed head from afar. Why is it that she can lose 20lbs in 20hrs, but I remain a chunky dumpling? She looked so good (everything is relative)!

· 1/14- After many, many semi-celebrity sighings I finally I get the real deal. I was at the Whole Foods in Brentwood and got in the checkout line behind Patrick Dempsey, who was looking very McDreamy! He kept looking around as though he was expecting someone to join him in line but no one appeared. He was buying all healthy food and looking casual cool in a dark navy sweater, jeans, pumas and a great tweed Kangol-like hat. The nickname is well deserved....

· Pre-globes hair extravaganza! I was getting my hairs did, half my color rinsed, when who should I see in the next seat at Bhava Salon getting her balayage-applied, sun-kissed look put together? Jessica Biel, that's who! I have never felt such awe over someone's perfect body, and she seemed (from observation, not conversation) so nice and happy. I really wanted to hear what she was saying, but I didn't.

· I saw Adam Brody eating wtih 2 girls in their early 20s at Canter's at about midnight last night. One of the girls looked like Mischa Barton from the back, but when she turned around, it clearly wasn't her. He and the girls were chatting and laughing with one of the waiters for short time—it looked like the waiter and him knew each other pretty well.

· Sunday late afternoon/early evening — a few folks clearly not on the Golden Globes party circuit...:

Andrea Anders (The Class, Joey) going to Healing Hands for a massage on Larchmont. That place is so reasonable even I can afford it...hope she has a show that makes it to season three and maybe she'll be able to afford Burke Williams?

Nick Stahl looking all gangly and skinny entered M Cafe with a friend only to turn around and leave. We saw them pass by later after with Quiznos cups in their hands. Guess he's not into macro-fare.

Jason Bateman and large entourage of friends at M Cafe...everybody in the place seemed to know each other, it felt sort of like eating at the Fox commissary.

· 1/15/2007 Carrie Underwood @ Grand Luxe Cafe Beverly Center. Wearing skinny jeans high heels, beige shoulder wrap top and A LOT of eye and face makeup. She looked slim and trim, was very nice.Trying not to be noticed. Was with another blond girl.

· the obligatory after justin timberlake concert round up. tuesday jan 16. saw paris and nicky hilton more than fashionably late. down on the floor teeny tiny singer omarion with a posse of girls. timbaland who later performed with justin and then saw fergie who probably peed her pants.

· A little late for this one, but saw Paris Hilton and Stavros Niarchos, heading towards the valet parking at the Grove —-hooded gray/black sweater, skinny jeans...skinny girl (even more so in [person]! Never thought I'd say this but she doesn't look nearly as trashy in real life...she was almost pretty: she seemed upset though, was walking behind Stavros, arms crossed...crying maybe? Anyway, nothing major, but thought I'd report....round happy hour (6pm), Sunday 1/7.

· Jan. 13th: At the Brass Monkey karaoke bar in Korea Town-
Family Guy's Seth MacFarlane and Mike Henry tearing up the karaoke floor on Saturday night. Seth not only karaoked to songs from "The Sound of Music" and "Aladdin," but he also sported an obscene amount of chest hair. Nothing like seeing a man sing "I am 16 going on 17" while his chest hair sang back up. Obligatory Hollywood Starlet glued to his side.

· Just saw The Shield's Michael Chiklis waiting at the valet with a healthy sized Maggiano's doggy bag at The Grove. His date: his mom. Awwww...

· Okay this is totally random but I'm having dinner with my wife and daughter @ Jerry's Deli in West Hollywood last night (Saturaday) and the restaurant is all abuzz. Tatum Channing and Marcellas Reynolds are having dinner there. Tatum's @ a huge table with 12 girls and Marcellas is with a gorgeous woman. But don't tell my wife I said that. Tatum keeps doing dance moves. The waitress said he was obnoxious. When Tatum's table gets up to leave the little girls scream and run over to Marcellas.

· Saturday, 1/13: Pretty sure I walked past Paul Simon on 4th in Santa Monica. I tried to pick out some distinguishing characteristic, then realized that Paul Simon doesn't really have any distinguishing characteristics (other than hobbit-like height). His mini-jowls suited his gloomy, fuck-I'm-cold expression.

· Jan from The Office (Melora Hardin) at Katsu-ya on Ventura. She looked just as good or better than she does on TV, surprisingly tall. Dining at the sushi bar with a nondescript blonde that looked like a sister or family member from their interaction, although I could totally be making that up. I'm just excited I saw Jan.

· This morning, MLK day, driving to yoga super hung over (it's a great detoxer), I saw MICHAEL RAPAPORT walking down the street in a residential neighborhood in Hancock Park. I know he lives around here, I see him all the time on Larchmont, but usually with his kids. He was all alone this morning, at 8 am or so, not on the phone, nothing. Nor did he seem like he was out for a "power walk" or anything, he was wearing normal clothes, not sports clothes or sneakers. Weird, nobody walks in L.A.!

· Thursday 1/11, saw Heidi Fleiss browsing the frozen food section at the Weho Trader Joes. She looks like she has lived a hard life. Then on Friday I sat by Kumar/Taj/Superman Returns bad guy with no lines actor Kal Penn during lunchtime at Aji-sai Sushi, also in Weho. He looked scruffy and rather adorable.

· I was having lunch in the courtyard/patio area of the Watergarden today Tuesday the 16th when all of a sudden I hear a loud obnoxious voice, I turn around and it's none other than Joe Francis of Girls Gone Wild fame, I was tempted to run up to him and ask whether the rumors about him tapping the "firecrotch" were true, but then I realized that the linguine I was eating was a lot more interesting. Does he work in the area? He ate at the table next to me at the La Salsa just down the street a few months ago, on that ocassion he loudly talked on his cell phone the whole time and completely ignored his lunch companion, I guess you can't really expect manners from a person who makes money off drunk naked 18 year old girls.

· Santa Monica, Friday 1-12: Sitting in the Sunshine Café (at St. John's hospital) early in the am. Sipping my coffee when in walks Ian Ziering. I am not a big fan of 90210 nor Mr. Ziering's subsequent "body of work," but I will readily admit that *DAMN,* the man did look some FINE. Fitted black motorcycle jacket and helmet only accentuated the hotness.

· Went to Privilege on Sunday night, which is gay night. The VIP room was D-list celebrity heaven: scarecrow like JANICE DICKINSON, being fawned over. I've met her before, she is scary skinny. Like a witch. Doesn't she realized you look younger if you have a wee bit of fat on your bones? She just looks...pulled very tight. And then JAI RODRIGUEZ from the recently canceled "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" sat at the table next to us. He was on his blackberry all night. I really don't understand that. You're at a club, you should be dancing and drinking and socializing. If you want to send emails nonstop, then STAY HOME!

· friday night, 1/12...the rock and roll porno party was in full effect at The Stand in Encino, thanks to Lukas Rossi - aka the guy who went on tv and won the right to be in a band with Tommy Lee - and Kendra Jade - aka the adult film star who once f'ed Jerry Springer. There they were, with an older, bald friend enjoying a hot dog dinner among the young families and alter-kackers.

I recognized him by his jumbo frosted fauxhawk. I recognized her by the tattooed "know your role" tribute to The Rock tattooed above her visible ass crack.