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· Celebrities terminate their unwanted pregnancies, just like us!
· George Clooney kicks off his paparazzi-foiling master plan by allowing himself to be photographed with a Deal or No Deal briefcase-opening technician. He's really mixing things up right off the bat.
· Finding a dead, gay Republican in her bed was just too much for Carrie Fisher's sobriety to bear.
For the latest in Mark Foley-related fun, we once again refer you to page-protective sister site Wonkette, where dramatic readings of old naughty IMs and links to new, naughty IMs are readily available.
These fake Free Anna Nicole shirts only hint at the hastily designed, topical Cafe Press delights to come.