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"There are only two kinds of cases I won't take. I won't take a pedophile I believe to be guilty and I won't take a terrorist."

Women's Wear Daily talks to Joseph Tacopina, esteemed defense counsel to folks like alleged shakedowner Jared Paul Stern and beleaguered teen paramour Diana Bianchi, not to mention Michael Jackson's manager and Aruban murder suspect Joran van der Sloot. Tacopina is almost militantly bland in comparison to his flamboyant client base, and that's his specialty — adroit, aggressive, tabloid-friendly PR manipulation largely (and disappointingly) devoid of sleaze. He's "earnest," you see, as opposed to "slick." And as long as you're not a (guilty) pedophile or terrorist, he'll be more than happy to represent you, Mr. Epstein.

The Devils' Advocate [WWD, sub req'd]