VP BOMBSHELL: Tim Kaine Allegedly Carries Multiple Harmonicas

While most were discussing whether America was (as President Obama asserted) sick as hell or (as Donald Trump countered) a total shithole, Gawker obtained some truly disturbing information Wednesday night: Senator Tim Kaine, a man who aspires to be one heartbeat away from the presidency, allegedly carries not one, or even two, but four harmonicas on his person.

I asked a former staffer to tell me something about Kaine. “He doesn’t just carry a harmonica—he carries *4* harmonicas,” she said.

— Molly Ball (@mollyesque) July 28, 2016

Atlantic writer Molly Ball, who first reported the shocking secret, attributed the claim to a former Kaine staffer. Coming from an ex-employee who may have a score to settle, Gawker was initially skeptical of the information, but shortly after midnight we uncovered this alarming footage:

On social media, harmonica experts argued that such behavior was not usual for an experienced player. Which may be true, but can America afford to elect a man who might bust out the ol’ mouth organ during a key meeting with foreign dignitaries? Can we?