A new study finds that lifting weights may “slow the age-related shrinking of some parts of our brains.” Don’t be weak, old, and dumb—squat.

The 20-year-old college student from Brazil who auctioned off her virginity for a cool $780,000 as part of a promotion for a documentary entitled Virgins Wanted now says the whole thing was kinda shady.

An intrepid reader writes, "How do you decide which is the better term 'apeshit' or 'batshit'? It must be a tough call." With all the different types of shit out there, choosing the correct shit can be a mess.

A new study on the world's gayest armies shows gay soldiers do not "cause disruption"

"Showtime," reports the Times, "is known for content that is too racy for network television, so it is perhaps fitting that its latest slogan should be inappropriate for the networks, too. A two-minute promotional spot on the cable network features the slogan, 'The Best Stuff on Television,' although the actual third word is an expletive that cannot be used by family-friendly networks (or newspapers)." The actual third word, is, of course, "shit," which the family-friendly Times will apparently only print if it comes out of the mouths of presidents or people threatening the governor's father. [NYT]

We're sure the study pinpointing ursine defecatory habits will be along any moment now. [AP, Reuters]

"U.S. executives have been able to secure more favourable research ratings for their companies from investment banks by bestowing professional favours on Wall Street analysts, according to new academic research to be published on Friday. The study found that by offering analysts favours, ranging from recommending them for a job to agreeing to speak to their clients, executives sharply reduced the chances of a downgrade in the aftermath of poor results or a controversial deal." Stunning, right? [FT]

New senior vice president of Daily News Digital: "Our whole policy is to do things as cheaply as possible." [NYP]

Uh, yeah, says "Access Hollywood."

Blogger confused his site only makes 18 bucks. Hello. It's all about the book deal. [GoWF]

Stanley Fish, guest op-ed columnist for the Times, delivers some scandalous news about the book industry and its nefarious machinations:

I don't think ANY of us saw this coming. There really is no one left to believe in anymore, is there?

So the David Sedaris takedown piece that we've waited so long for has finally arrived, courtesy of the folks at The New Republic. Unfortunately, the takedown has nothing to do with the fact that Sedaris is essentially the Dave Barry for the NPR set. Instead, it focuses on the fact that—wait for it—some of Sedaris' obvious bullshit is, uh, bullshit. For those of you who don't have a subscription, here's what TNR (who know from fake writers) has discovered about America's Greatest Middlebrow Humorist.