A disfiguring dance floor accident forced David Arquette into rehab. Eva Longoria rebounds with Penelope Cruz's brother. T.I. gets "frisky" in jail. James Franco: "Maybe I'm just gay." Thursday gossip hits rock bottom.

Kevin Spacey fights for the right to stay in the glass closet. Nick Cannon confirms that Mariah's having twins. David Arquette confirms that he's having a breakdown. Thursday gossip knows that you know that he knows, but what about her?

After months of speculation, Mariah Carey announced this morning that she is pregnant with Nick Cannon's child. She must be so pissed at Thandie Newton for letting the cat out of the bag last night.

Jessica Simpson's dad blows off our troops. Lindsay Lohan gets visited by the 'rents. Chelsea Handler and Nick Cannon engage in the worst twitter fight ever. Jesse James has is own personal HIV panic. Sunday Gossip Roundup is getting warm.

David Arquette's rumored mistress is a bar brawling Hollywood mean girl. Courteney Cox ditches her wedding ring. Minka Kelly's mother was a stripper. Al Franken makes an airport security joke. Tuesday gossip sneaks into your bed and steals your husband.

Ben Harper and Laura Dern: Splitsville, USA. Population: Them. Justin Bieber's new line of nail polish! Mariah Carey throws a birthday bash. Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart spotted doing normal couple things. Sunday Gossip Roundup! It's here.

Mr. Mariah Carey seeks sponsors for his birthday party. Paris Hilton "quits the club scene." Liza Minnelli celebrates photo retouching. Lindsay Lohan gets a job. Wednesday gossip will get you through the hump of the week.

Auditions were held in two of America's weirdest cities, Orlando and Portland, for last night's two-part episode. A "magician" fell off stage and Nick Cannon grinded with an up and coming diva. Slow motion fails and other highlights after link.

Who do you think is 2010's "hottest woman"? Well, it doesn't matter, because the answer is Katy Perry, who tops Maxim's " 2010 Hot 100." The fact that she has a new album coming out this summer? Merely a coincidence.

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon renewed their vows earlier this week, and now Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott are are planning on doing it. Someone please put an end to this!

Jessica Simpson wants to be Michelle Obama, somehow. Jennifer Aniston is locked in a fitness war with a swimsuit model. Peaches wore a confederate flag shirt. Brooke Shields. Sunday's Gossip Roundup is giving a voice to the (literally) small people.

Did he leave because Sandy left him? Tiger's security guards against Uchitel. Charlie Sheen can't afford to quit his terrible TV show. Jessica Alba plans to adopt. Easter Sunday's gossip roundup will rise again.

Hello, world. Would you like a gift? Well, good, because Mariah Carey just gave you one with her crazy (in a good way) interview with Ryan Seacrest on E!'s Live from the Red Carpet. Inside, Mimi at her finest.

Jimmy Kimmel walking around SoHo yesterday with friends ... Diane Kruger shopping for baby clothes on the Upper East Side ... Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon arriving at JFK ... Sarah Jessica Parker walking to the public library in the West Village with son James ... Bethenny Frankel leaving Rockefeller Center yesterday after an appearance on the Today show... Ugly Betty's America Ferrera walking her dog on Broadway, just south of Union Square ... Catherine Zeta-Jones signing autographs outside the Walter Kerr Theatre on Monday night ... and Brad Pitt carrying daughter Shiloh on the set of Salt at Pier 66.

Sienna and Jude's balls: Barbados-bound. Together they'll make domestic reconciliation layer cake. Lady Gagadong's moneyballs will drop on New Years. William Hurt is your new existential bicycle. Gene Simmons is still trying to rock. Presenting your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup:

A pregnant Padma Lakshmi withdrawing cash from an ATM ... Nicole Kidman leaving her apartment building in the West Village ... Penelope Cruz and Javier Bardem arriving at JFK ... Kelly Bensimon shopping at Whole Foods ... Keri Russell talking on her cell phone ... Hugh Jackman picking up daughter Ava from school ... Catherine Zeta-Jones exiting her apartment building on Central Park West ... Josh Duhamel and Fergie walking around SoHo ... Rachel McAdams getting out of a car in front of ABC studios ... Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz leaving Bloomingdale's with their son Bronx ... Sarah Jessica Parker walking in the Village ... and Bethenny Frankel walking her dog in Midtown.

Alicia Silverstone riding the subway and listening to her iPod ... Vincent D'Onofrio hailing a cab in SoHo ... Ryan Reynolds walking downtown ... Nick Cannon and Mariah Carey leaving a building together .. Amber Rose shopping in SoHo with a friend ... Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis on the set of their new movie, Black Swan ... Tara Reid arriving at MTV studios in Times Square ... Taylor Swift getting ice cream with Emma Stone at a Baskin Robbins on Wednesday night ... Celine Dion signing autographs outside her hotel ... and Young Jeezy posing for pictures with a fan on the street.

Kind of like a Harry Potter book, right? Michael Lohan's now Jon Gosselin's contracts expert. Nothing but squares at the Daily News. Robert Pattinson hates his life. Carrie Prejean: monumentally stupider than previously imagined. Here's your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup:

• Madonna reveals all sorts of juicy, personal stuff in an interview in the November issue of Rolling Stone. Like how she really wanted to work with Eminem, but he turned her down (ouch); how her graffiti tag name back in the '80s was "Boy Toy" (how ironic!); and how she was a total geek in high school, just like every other celeb in the universe. [P6, NYDN]
• Penelope Cruz is making a cameo in the Sex & the City sequel. Get ready to suspend belief: She'll be playing the role of a banker. [People]
• Emanuel Ungaro "creative consultant" Lindsay Lohan is blaming the epic disaster that was her recent fashion show in Paris on "coming in so late and having not that much time to do a whole collection." She also says she's still "learning" and that the negative press isn't going to stop her from returning to Paris in a few months to give it another shot. You go, girl! [People]
• Because he's a romantic at heart, Alex Rodriguez flew to Miami for a single night to take Kate Hudson to dinner. Oh, yea, and to see his kids, too. [P6]

Actor (and Michael Bloomberg supporter) Matt Damon turns 39 today. Soon-Yi Previn, or Mrs. Woody Allen, is turning 39, too. Chevy Chase is 66. Rev. Jesse Jackson is turning 68. Sigourney Weaver turns 60. Former presidential hopeful Dennis Kucinich is turning 63. Director Ed Zwick is 57. Children's author R.L. Stine is turning 66. Netflix founder Reed Hastings is 49. Comic book writer Harvey Pekar turns 70. Nick Cannon is 29. Jeremy Davies is 40. And actor Paul Hogan of Crocodile Dundee fame turns 70.