A drunk idiot with a long, cab-related arrest record briefly hijacked a taxi early Saturday, and results were predictable: Police chased him the wrong way down a one-way street and he crashed into a utility pole. [NYDN]

Cimex lectularius experts gathered in DC earlier this month and, besides giving up all hope of eradication, came to a conclusion: "Bed bugs are not going away any time soon." Great. [via Daily Intel]

A park bench that was donated in Katharine Hepburn's honor on East 47th Street has, according to the Post, turned into a "hotbed for raunch and pot, with wanton women engaging in midafternoon sex acts as perverted men stare while smoking weed." Well, a visit to Dag Hammarskjold Plaza just made our list of weekend activities. [NYP]

Staten Island resident Annette Gerhardt thought she was being sooo clever: She planned to scare her 6-year-old daughter Enayla straight after she'd acted out in school by bring her down to the police station and telling her "this is where bad girls and boys go." But the police were not in the mood. From the Daily News:

Taping in Rockefeller Center sure is dangerous, and not because of all the annoying tourists. Today while taping in the outdoor plaza, a crazy person hopped the barricade and lunged for hosts Meredith Vieira, Al Roker, and an android known as the Willie Geist 3000. Don't worry, no weathermen were injured in the making of this film.

Today we looked at a list of the world's most livable cities — decided by pure science and not just some arbitrary criteria, obviously. America's biggest city, New York, was pretty low on the list! Some of you might disagree with that assessment, but one commenter resignedly doesn't.

Every year the Economist Intelligence Unit looks at all the cities in the world and ranks their livability based on stability, health care, culture and environment, education, and infrastructure. Which city came out on top?

Le Parker Meridien hotel on West 56th Street has a great deal for horny people looking to get some quick ass on their lunch break, according to the Post: For $150 you can have a room from 11am - 3pm but, for an extra $100 you get "champagne, strawberries with whipped cream and an on-demand adult film of your choice."

The New York area almost had a huge influx of opium last month! That is, until officers from U.S. Customs and Border Protection at JFK decided to get nosy and crack open a porcelain cat statue that came in on a flight from Thailand. Inside they found a bag of raw opium, and, after opening the other statues, discovered a total of 205-pounds of it, worth an estimated $9 million.

Yesterday New Jersey governor Chris Christie once again talked shit about the cast of Jersey Shore and said he wants New York to "take them back." He really needs to shut up about this.

Mayor Bloomberg, visiting the Brooklyn Brewery yesterday said, "I actually put ice in my beer," to the horror of Brooklyn beer snobs. The Post asked the editor of All About Beer magazine, Julie Johnson, how Bloomberg should enjoy his beer:

It's a well-known fact that someday, all of New York will be reduced to a smoldering, hellish wasteland, a post-apocalyptic desert so bad it will make The Road look like Sex and the City, a badland consisting of the ashes of a once-mighty city felled by war, disease, terror, or Zu'ul. Luckily, we've got an official legal manual!

Just before 3 am on Friday at the Bowery Poetry Club, a private Fashion Week kick-off party was starting to wind down. Hundreds of drunk partygoers had left or were on their way out, while several took turns puking and sleeping on the sidewalk nearby. But the dedicated stayed put, waiting for the night's rumored special guest, Harlem rapper Cam'ron.

Do you care about children, the education of children, or the future of children, and our system for educating them? Then we have bad news for you. Lots of bad news.

Watch out if you plan on filing a race discrimination complaint against FDNY — you just might find a noose hanging in your locker. At least that's what Gregory Seabrook, a communications electrician for the department, says happened to him last Thursday.

Two Brooklyn and Long Island drug crews probably thought they had one-upped each other in a deal last month when the Brooklyn guys sold the Long Island guys crushed-up sheetrock as cocaine for $16,000 in counterfeit bills. What dumbasses.

[During a Chinese New Year celebration in New York's Chinatown, a dragon dances at the entrance to a store to bring it luck in the Year of the Rabbit. Image via AP]

NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg was relieved that the groundhog voluntarily left his cabin during yesterday's Groundhog Day event, saying, "That was so much better than having to reach in and let the little son of a bitch bite you." Amen.

Twitter has been abuzz all night with the news that tween pop star Justin Bieber was booed at Madison Square Garden during tonight's Knicks-Mavericks game. Well, now we have video—and it's true! Aw. Leave the poor girl alone!

New York's city council just banned smoking in all parks by a vote of 36-12. Signs announcing the ban will be posted within 90 days, says the AP. Now what will shirtless middle-aged dudes do while rollerblading?