In a setup that would make Jimmy Kimmel green with envy, two Dutch pranksters visited a major culinary convention to show off their new line of delicious, organic food—actually bog standard McDonald's fare, just cut up and skewered with toothpicks.

Zwarte Piet, or "Black Pete," has been controversial in the Netherlands for decades. A surprising number of citizens think the character, Santa's Little-Black-Sambo-lookalike sidekick, is harmless. An Amsterdam court ruled today that he's not.

[A child watches a show by the French street theatre company Les Plasticiens Volant, featuring giant, terrifying puppets, during an event to mark the start of the Christmas shopping season in Amsterdam, Netherlands on Thursday. Photo by Peter Dejong via AP]

On a nondescript road in the Netherlands, in full view of other motorists — including an extremely loud school bus teeming with excitable oglers — one man finds a mature way to relieve the stress of being stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic.

Planes flying the banners of two rival Dutch political parties experienced a harrowing mid-air collision over a beach in Wassenaar on Saturday.

Footage of a man who was reportedly decapitated after jumping in front of train in the Dutch city of Driehuis was posted to Twitter by the teenagers who recorded it, and was quickly retweeted by many Twitter users in the Netherlands.

Meet Ed Houben, a 42-year-old Dutch nerd who couldn't get laid to save his life until he became a sperm donor. According to a hard-to-believe Der Spiegel article, a Houben actually lost his virginity in a sperm donation situation straight out of a porno:

An attack on a company that certifies secure websites has forced the Dutch government to abandon email for faxes and snail mail. How long before frustrated citizens take to the streets and smash windows with postal scales and rolls of thermal paper?

The Netherlands' right-wing coalition government announced yesterday that it will ban tourists from weed-selling coffee shops by the end of the year, effectively giving the finger to backpackers everywhere. And while we generally support liberal drug laws, and have no fondness for Geert Wilders' anti-Muslim Freedom Party, we don't really blame the Dutch for wanting to limit drug tourism, given that it attracts the most annoying people on the planet.

A shooter with an automatic weapon opened fire in a shopping mall in the Dutch town of Alphen aan den Rijn, killing six and wounding 10 before taking his own life. It's the second shooting in as many weeks in the town of 70,000 (two were killed on April 2), though it's unclear if the incidents were connected; the gunman in today's massacre was apparently shooting indiscriminately. He hasn't been identified, though he is apparently "known to police." [BBC; image via AP]

In exchange for support in trimming the nation's deficit, the Dutch government bowed to fascist politician Geert Wilders and his Freedom Party yesterday, by agreeing to ban burqas in the Netherlands. Meanwhile, he's still on trial for inciting racial hatred.

Two passengers on a Chicago-to-Amsterdam flight have been arrested for "preparation of a terrorist attack."

If only we hadn't failed miserably at betting on the World Cup. We would have won money! Spain won 1-0 against the Netherlands today. Andres Iniesta scored the winner in extra time. Pulpo Paul goes eight for eight.

After nearly two periods of extra time and 116 minutes of play—plus an epic drop-kick—Spain's Andres Iniesta scored to lead his team to its first ever World Cup championship over the Netherlands. Video of the winning goal, inside.

One criticism of soccer is the faking of injuries by players (like this, or this), but this was real. In what should have been a red card (was yellow, instead), the Netherlands' De Jong just drop-kicked Spain's Alonso. Video inside.

If you're not watching the Netherlands-Spain World Cup final right now, you're one of the few. FIFA expects the match will be the "biggest event ever." (The 2006 World Cup finalwas watched by 700 million.)Vamos, Espana. (Via Daily Intel)

The World Cup is almost over. We won't know who technically won until after tomorrow's final. But like a human Paul the Octopus, Zach Dundas, author of the book The Renegade Sportsman, already knows who really won the tournament.

Paul the Psychic Octopus has some competition—a 13-year-old Singaporean parakeet named Mani has picked the Netherlands to beat Spain in the World Cup championship game on Sunday. Mani was right about the quarterfinals and Spain beating Germany.

The World Cup now enters its Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome phase. We began with a thriving civilization of 31 proud soccer nations (plus France). Only four battle-hardened survivors remain to spar over scarce resources in an unforgiving environment.

The Netherlands beat Brazil 2-1 in the World Cup quarterfinals. At 2:30: Ghana vs. Uruguay.