Major media companies say online piracy is such a problem that the federal government should adopt a draconian system of blockades and blacklists to stop infringement. But maybe they should first focus on the pirates they pay and employ, who've just been exposed torrenting the hell out of competitors' movies and TV shows.

You were, likely, worried about the ability of Comcast-NBC to push effectively for its interests on Capitol Hill. Sorry — we mean, push for the interests of American consumers. But worry no more! The cable giant has hired Meredith Attwell Baker for "a top DC lobbying job," and we have a feeling she's going to do a great job. You've heard of Baker — she used to be one of the Republican commissioners of the FCC. Four months ago, she voted to approve the NBC-Comcast merger? But that was four whole months ago, so Comcast probably forgot about it before they hired her.

Deposed NBC potentate Jeff Zucker threw a bar mitzvah at the Four Seasons. The Zuckers were priced out of a Kanye appearance ($1 million), so they settled for Drake, some nice roast chicken, and Converse sneakers for everyone. Mazel tov!

Now that Comcast is officially taking over NBC Universal today, the cable company has unveiled a horrible new logo for the famed broadcaster. The response hasn't been too kind. But we know you can come up with something better!

The FCC has approved the proposed combination of cable provider Comcast and NBC Universal. Pretty soon one corporation will own everything.

Comcast said today it will replace outgoing NBC Universal chief Jeff Zucker with Comcast COO Stephen Burke, when Zucker leaves at the end of the year. Comcast hopes Burke will lead NBC into "a new era of growth." [Bloomberg]

After a long period of speculation, incompetent NBC Universal CEO Jeff Zucker finally announced today that he'll be leaving once Comcast's takeover of NBC is complete. He won't be missed. He'll be running for office soon. Mawkish goodbye memo, below.

Aspiring television people: NBC's got a job offer for you! Apply now to be an NBC page, working on famous, still-existing shows The Jay Leno Show and The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brian [sic]. It was posted last month.

Most of Conan O'Brien's staff turned in their badges and Blackberries this weekend, and employee Aaron Bleyart documented the scorched earth affair. No, seriously, the place has been razed. NBC's preferred renovation appears to be explosives. [BAM]

Many years ago, NBC decided that the guy who came up with the idea of doing concerts on The Today Show would make a great network head. Now they are in last place. Except in jokes, where they are first.

Yesterday we told you about Time Inc.'s freelancer scam—the company will pay you quickly, but it'll cost you up to 4%. Today, another tipster has clued us in to NBC Universal's version, which is even worse.

Actually save it for when the deal actually goes through. But that time has moved closer now that Comcast announced a $30 billion deal to take over NBC Universal from GE. The next big question: Are regulators going to flip?

The official announcement today that Comcast will take over NBC/Universal marks the greatest counter-revolutionary change in show business history with flyover country now postioned to put its stamp on Hollywood, rather than vice-versa.

GE and Comcast officially announced that this morning that they've come to terms on a deal over NBC Universal. It's really, really complicated, but the upshot is that Jeff Zucker still has a job for some reason.

Are you ready to be entertained by a behemoth? General Electric is on the brink of selling NBC Universal to Comcast—a deal that will create one of the nation's largest entertainment companies and make everyone the same everywhere.

Somewhere out there in Hollywood, there are a few dozen people who made bets that "scandal was never the way to win over audiences" kicking themselves, hard.

For the past few months Hollywood's favorite two guessing games have been: Who's going to take over NBC/Universal and what's going to happen to ex-Fox chief Peter Chernin? Well, yesterday the two games collided in a paradigm-exploding pile-up.

Firings, sell-offs, suicide stories and Joe Pesci's leftovers; It's a bummer of a day for everyone in Hollywood who is not locked into the role of James T. Kirk.

Bill O'Reilly, call your office: Citing CNBC, Reuters says Rupert Murdoch is interested in buying a piece of NBC Universal, which could lead to a major embarrassment when O'Reilly draws Keith Olbermann in the corporate Secret Santa program.

Ever-struggling Universal, which produced the horrible Bruno and Land of the Lost, will replace its two co-chairmen to save itself. But don't worry, says President Ron Meyer, "We are not in any chaotic state." If you say so. [NYT]