• Katie Couric to narrate PBS docu on Walter Cronkite. No one ever said she's not clever. [B&C]
• Why does Bush likes to pick on the Times? Because of the Jews, of course. [SFChron]
• The New Yorker rock critic Sasha Frere-Jones wants to be a rocker, too. [LAWeekly]
• September VF will focus on fashion, be as fat as Vogue. [WWD]
TED, the futuristic conference that calls itself "a preview of Heaven" just released this year's keynote speeches online. Most of the clips from the February TED conference aren't geeky or funny enough. But New York Times personal tech columnist David Pogue is both. Forgive a few well-worn jokes and listen to his witty — if pedantically delivered — piano parodies. "The Bill Gates Song" is destined to be a summer jam.
Having a famous parent is the gift that keeps on giving; if you're not a heroin addict or a pseudo-struggling artiste, you're most likely using parental pull to score the best of the entry-level gigs (like Cate Edwards and one of the Katzenbergs, who shuffled the cushy papers at Vanity Fair). Because we all must stay abreast of which celebrity spawn are answering whose phones, do keep in mind that should you have the balls to call Elle fashion director and Project Runway judge Nina Garcia, you'll be greeted by her assistant, Jade Frampton, daughter of guitarist Peter Frampton. And good for Jade! She really must've scored the position all by her lonesome, 'cause Daddy's hair wasn't doing her any favors.
On Friday night, singer/songwriter John Mayer abandoned his lonely-chick rock persona for a moment and tried his hand at stand-up comedy. The singer went on as a special guest at the Comedy Cellar, where one blogger noted that he seemed "drunk or stoned, maybe both." Excellent! Some lessons learned from Mayer on the mic:
It became clear to us that Radar Online would be returning this summer on June 5, when we were forwarded an email a Radar intern sent to music-biz publicists seeking CDs for review. And last Friday that window got more specific, when we learned that Radar Online will likely be launching in July. How did we learn this? When we were forwarded a another email, from another Radar intern, sent to music-biz publicists and seeking CDs for review.
Well, look who turned back up on Pitchfork's masthead. We know, we know; that whole taking-a-stand-for- journalistic-integrity thing gets boring real fast, don't it?
Remain mystified by Connie Chung's off-key, ill-choreographed, nonsensically lyric'ed song-and-dance routine bidding farewell to her avec-Maury MSNBC show? (Haven't seen it yet? Oh, go watch. You'll thank us.) In this morning's Times, media reporter Jacques Steinberg graciously explains. It was, as Connie insists, all just a joke. Oh really? Hmm. In this case, then, we fear Connie never learned what our father used to tell us were the first and second cardinal rules of humor: First, your joke must be funny. Second, other people must think it's funny. How we wish we'd been able to explain this to her last week.
New Out editor Aaron Hicklin has a mantra for the magazine: "Let's be Bowie gay, not Cher gay."
• Several confirmations today: God is dead, the world is nothing more than a cesspool of injustice, the horsemen are en route, and Anna Nicole Smith is pregnant. [R&M]
• Life & Style claims Lindsay Lohan spent $1 million on clothes last year and is now seeing a hypnotist to cure her shopping addiction. As if that addiction were her biggest problem. [Scoop]
• The Red Hot Chili Peppers may face a major lawsuit if Tom Petty decides that the band's first single, Dani California, is as similar to Mary Jane's Last Dance as everyone says it is. [Page Six]
• Uber-manager Benny Medina declares a moratorium on email. If he can make Mariah Carey into a similar taboo, then we'll really be impressed. [Lowdown]
• Les Moonves' wife Julie Chen finally comes clean and acknowledges that she's a robot. [Page Six]
• Eager to make career choices that will help her come out of her divorce looking mature and classy, Denise Richards joins the Pussycat Dolls. [TMZ]
• Kim Basinger files a motion to prevent her ex-husband Alec Baldwin from publishing a book about the ruin of their marriage. Let's take Basinger's side on this one — do we really want to hear any more about the 45-year-long divorce? [IMDb]
The Post reports today that velvet mafioso David Geffen has dropped a wee $10 million on a condo at 158 Mercer Street (he also has a residence at 810 Fifth and an estate in Malibu, for which he fights relentlessly to keep commoners off of "his" beach). The Observer, however, notes that Geffen himself will not be living in the Mercer Street loft; he is one of three trustees listed on the deed-transfer record. The lucky new denizen of Soho is Saturday Night Live producer and fashion progeny Marci Klein, which the Post reported in April — though today, oddly, the paper makes no mention of Klein being the actual resident.
• Brad Pitt announces that his baby with Angelina Jolie is "imminent." Really? Did he just figure this out? What tipped him off? Did Zahara tell him? [CNN]
• Former Nanny Fran Drescher tells Howard Stern that she'd love a career in New York politics. Too bad not many people would willingly listen to her while she explained her platform. [Cityrag]
• Times mag on May 7; New Yorker on May 15; the Times today. It's official: the Dog Whisperer is overexposed. [NYT]
• Al Roker goes to Philly and gets a face shot. [Philadelphia Will Do]
• Got a hipster band but no success to speak of? Strong arm your way on the Misshapes playlist with a Joy Division cover. Ian Curtis = cash money. [My Old Kentucky]
• In LA, Madonna kicked off her world tour in fine form: by hanging herself from a giant disco crucifix. Those $400 tickets are going to be worth every penny. [AP]
• Kelly Ripa smells like fish. She won't tell you why, but we've some guesses. Nothing a little Summer's Eve can't fix. [BWE]
• Attention ladies and gays: looking for love? Try riding the subway between 5 and 6 AM, when the male/female ratio is 9:1. [Graphpaper]
• Oprah's sorority sister Gayle King is angling for Star Jones' spot on The View, but her friendship with Jones makes it hard for King to execute a campaign. Is this really a difficult choice? Or is Gayle just stupid? [R&M]
• Ted Casablancas introduces the world's most thinly veiled blind item ever. The use of Morgan makes it even more impressive. [Awful Truth]
• Katie Couric nets an impressive $115K to speak about herself at the University of Oklahoma's graduation ceremony. [Lowdown (2nd item)]
• Don't get too excited for the upcoming Guns n' Roses shows at Hammerstein. Axl Rose didn't even show up at a rehearsal attended by Sebastian Bach — what makes you think he'll appear for little old you? [Page Six]
• Paris Hilton is thrilled to promote her new video game, even if she has no fucking clue what it's called. At least she got her name right. [AP]
• O.J. Simpson proves that it's actually possible to be less funny than Ashton Kutcher. [Page Six]
• Ashlee Simpson won't talk about her rumored nose job. The work speaks for itself. [IMDb]
• And just because it's Friday: we cannot stop looking at the hypnotizing monstrosity of Uma Thurman's breasts. [Yeeeah]
And a cute lil' vid to end your day: how John Lennon invented the iPod.
