It's no secret that Bill "Papa Bear" O'Reilly is a media punchingbag. So when Intern Mary heard about his recent claim that homeless veterans don't exist, she began to wonder if Bill's comments were taken out of context and spun into oblivion by crazed bloggers like they always seem to be. Does Bill only talk about patriotism and veterans when he's trying to make a point? Yearning to discover the real Bill, she dove into Billoreilly.com once more to find out just what Bill has said about vets in the past. The results of the search, in handy chart form (along with representative samples!), after the jump.

As Super Tuesday drags to a middle, it's worthwhile to look at the rising and occasionally falling fortunes of New York Senator Hillary Clinton, our next, cryingest president, among our nation's most unfortunately influential lunatic opinion-makers.

Marc Andreessen savages the New York Times Co.'s board for their lack of Internet experience: "So, if you want to issue bonds to pay for FCC-approved snack cake manufacturing in a submarine on display at a national park by a sundress-wearing cigarette-puffing Levitra-popping Judy Miller, you're pretty much set. Go team!" [blog.pmarca.com]

The 1990s gave us a war in Iraq, a trial starring O.J. Simpson, and an overdose of Bill Clinton in the media. My, how things have changed! Well, sort of. Magazines are still dying off like nobody's business. After the jump, a gallery of the past year's casualties as well as victims from the dot-com era. Give us your predictions for 2008's likely fatalities-we'll post your nominations and rub your belly if you end up being right.

We are sooo excited to watch the returns come in tonight on CNN'S MAGIC WALL. The "Magic Wall" is the highly technical term for the touchscreen iPhone thing CNN makes its anchors use to report primary results. As seen in the Slate video attached below, you can expect some fun times. It's just like Minority Report! Or like watching your server enter your order at the Cheesecake Factory! [WP via TVNewser]

A while back, we asked, "at what point will American Apparel's billboards show some equal opportunity and start featuring fully-splayed half-naked men as well as women?" Hallelujah, that day has almost arrived! Dutch magazine Butt ("a pocket-size, quarterly magazine for and about homosexuals") has saved us via an AA model search for boys. No photos yet, but rest assured, we're on this. [Butt Magazine]

Coverage of the Giants tickertape parade is trumping coverage of primary voting on all the New York stations. Cable news net NY1, though, has attempted to make their broadcast of ecstatic fans and slow-moving floats educational nonetheless, with Pat Kiernan making countless digressions into how the parade is blocking polling places, highlighting the unsung heroism of our fair city's sanitation department, and pointing out that many Wall Street buildings no longer have windows from which employees can toss shredded documents. [NY1]

Trouble in the Windy City! Not only has the parent company of the Chicago Sun-Times put itself up for sale, but the paper's editorial page editor has finally resigned over changes made to her edit board's political endorsements. In a departing note to staff, Cheryl Reed tosses in allegations of racism and sexism over the editorials, which she says were "were rewritten by white men." And we thought white women were the problem! Our post-feminist rant after the jump.

Earlier on Today, Matt Lauer lobbed a couple softballs at John McCain, then Meredith Vieira interviewed Hillary Clinton with some tough, contentious questions about why, precisely, the former first lady hadn't just locked this goddamn nomination up already. Because she's a liar? Then Matt Lauer had a genial chat with Barack Obama. LEAVE HILLARY ALONE!

No environmental program has ever in the history of ever been more brutally-named than "ReMix," the city's new "Recycling Magazines Is Excellent!" campaign. The plan aims to draw attention to the wasteful practices of the glossies industry, which, AdAge tells us, often prints copies of issues which nobody reads. Stunning. There are some decent ideas in the green scheme (recycled paper is good! Extraneous direct mail is bad!) but it's hard not to walk away with the idea that the only way for a magazine to be ecologically sustainable is to uh, well, flop. So much better for Mother Earth! After the jump, a gallery of magazines so environmentally cutting-edge that they've been dead for years.

Whoa! Novelist Michael Chabon (The Yiddish Policemen's Union) hits us with a little dose of crazy about Obama in a Washington Post op-ed. Basically, he's sick to death of people talking smack about Obama when they damn well know he's the best man for the job. In fact, he isn't isn't going to take it anymore! "There are many reasons not to support Barack Obama's candidacy for president," he begins, "but every one of them is bad for the same reason."

"Where friends and neighbors are also newsmakers, journalists must guard against giving them extra access or a more sympathetic ear," reads a section of the New York Times' online "Ethics in Journalism" document. "When practical, the best solution is to have someone else deal with them." Makes sense! Which is why we found ourselves stroking our nonexistent beard over Times war guy Dexter Filkins' review today of New Yorker war guy George Packer's new play, "Betrayed," based on an insanely long story Packer wrote last year for the magazine. Turns out the two of them are close pals, which explains so much about both the above photograph and Filkins' (left) review.

"Hollywood director Robert Greenwald" and the Daily News's Rush & Molloy made Bill O'Reilly very sad when they send some homeless vets over to Fox News's New York headquarters to deliver a petition to Bill O'Reilly about how they actually do exist. O'Reilly's ambush producer exclusively revealed that most of the picketing homeless vets don't even watch Fox. Then Bill played a clip from Xanadu. A Rush & Molloy stringer was also sort of abused, amusingly. Clip after the jump!

Aw, Jann Wenner's all growed up and seemingly responsible and stuff! The Rolling Stone publisher magnate wrapped up a deal in December to purchase a Hudson river estate in Tivoli, NY. At the moment, Wenner's on paternity leave while he and his partner adjust to the arrival of their baby twins via surrogate. We're picturing Baby Boom-inspired scenes of Wenner skittering across the frozen tundra to make his burping shift, and the image pleases us immensely. But with this new upstate-refuge-plus-suckling-infants makeover Wenner's got going on, wherever will we go for our dose of raging grandiose megalomaniacal assholery? Oh, erm. For a second we forgot where we lived. Never mind, Jann, nest away. You know, until you think people have forgotten about you, when we're sure you'll execute a perfectly graceful re-entry into Manhattan's orbit.

* "I was almost a newspaper delivery boy but lacked the snazzy cap and knee-shorts. And the delivery manager tried 'initiating' me by warming his hands by sliding them down the front of my pants on a 5am street corner. Even for San Francisco, I thought that was a bit odd. I mean, it wasn't that cold."

In internet land, everybody's very excited about the Redmond software giant's bid for Jerry Yang's languishing internet directory. Where would a combination leave AOL? (Answer: without an obvious acquirer or partner.) What about the challenge to Google? (Finally, a competitor, financed by Microsoft's profits from its bloated operating system and office applications.) Most of the commentary is overblown. Fusing two mediocre internet units, Microsoft's MSN and Yahoo, will not magically produce a dynamic challenger to Google; merely, if business precedent is any guide, mediocrity on a greater scale. Unfortunately, the petrified traditional media companies don't know that. (They don't know anything really.) And that's why the creation of another internet behemoth would be so pernicious.

Did you know? Men usually over-state how smart they are, and women often dumb themselves down. Not like we needed a study to believe this, but at least it's now a scientific fact. In the Belfast Telegraph, What Makes Women Happy author Fay Weldon pontificates on this in what we can only call a jumblefuck. Or as Salon put its, "another bassackward, barely intelligible diatribe on one of [Weldon's] favorite topics: how women should adapt to men's sexism."

Back when John Edwards was running for president of America's Liberal White Men, he'd mention, at every opportunity, that there are 200,000 homeless veterans across our glorious nation. Hearing this upset Bill O'Reilly, who decided then that such a thing is impossible. Bill first insisted that there was no such thing as a homeless vet, then eventually ceded that there might be some, but probably not that many. He's right! There are only 196,000 homeless vets. Some of them protested outside Fox's headquarters yesterday, with the intention of providing Bill with a petition. Press coverage of the protest was minimal, though an O'Reilly producer showed up. The producer, Jesse Watters, is O'Reilly's official "ambush" man, and probably the smarmiest fuck on the planet. According to Radar, he spent a great deal of time accusing vets of, uh, calling our troops "baby-killers." The Culture War no longer even follows its own internal logic, does it? Anyway—there's video from the organizers. It's after the jump. [NYDN, Radar]

Oh come on now, again? The CIA has subpoenaed Pulitzer-winning New York Times reporter James Risen, to get the name of a source from the journalist's blockbuster 2006 book State of War, in which he disclosed all sorts of things about U.S. intelligence shenanigans and said some mean things about President Bush. Maybe Risen can get some fashion tips from his former colleague, Judith Miller-it's so hard these days to figure out what goes with a public stockade.