Jonathan and Jenny Selbin—two people who deserve one another—are both attorneys and the worst neighbors you could possibly imagine. In February, they filed a lawsuit against their neighbor for smoking in her own apartment, taking her to court even after she bought air purifiers because her smoking was "endangering" their sensitive child. The note they slipped under her door at the time read "As you may not be aware, we are both lawyers and both litigators, for whom the usual barriers to litigation are minimal." That bit made them the runaway winners of our February ""Which snippet from the Times Real Estate section makes you most want to assault the person in the story?" contest. Now, the suit has been settled [NYT]—and the Selbins are concerned about their own reputation.

I once wrote a story about Consumer Reports that involved a field trip to the timeless, servicey magazine's headquarters and labs. They're an amazing sight, and certainly the most fun place to visit in Yonkers. They take their work very seriously. Testing washing machines, for example, involves counting individual strands of frayed string off test items that have been washed hundreds of times. Their audio testing lab is a free-floating, echo-proof room that looks like a Star Trek set. This is my anecdotal way of introducing the fact that Consumer Reports has posted a selection of its classic testing photos, and after the jump you can find the five most amusing—one for each decade from the 1930s to the 1970s. Back to the future!

A full list of the 2008 Pulitzer Prize winners follows. A few surprises in there: did we know that Bob Dylan got a Special Citation for "his profound impact on popular music and American culture, marked by lyrical compositions of extraordinary poetic power"? And that the Editorial Writing award went to... no one?

"The Gawker is the modern day version of Playgirl, a 'straight' publication gay men feel good about buying because they're tired of low quality faggy stuff the pink media puts out." That's former gay porn star and current conservative blogger Matt Sanchez's take, and no facts will get in the way of his analysis! We asked Sanchez, who believes all contributors to Gawker are homosexual, to comment on today's post about all the gays working at the New York Times. And the former Freshmen magazine cover model blows the doors off liberal media lies such as "the Gawker's stance that it is a non-gay website"!

Brooklyn's Bushwick Courier warns of a scary prospect for the neighborhood in its cover story: "SQUATTERS AND ADDICTS." Oh no! But it was a false alarm: although the story promises to jump to page 21, it actually just disappears! April fools? Or just April community-paper-operating-at-normal-quality-levels? [Animal NY]

The Wall Street Journal's Jessica Vascellaro is moving from New York to Silicon Valley to take over the Google and Yahoo beat. Watch out, Eric Schmidt and Jerry Yang: Vascellaro's article on the rift between Liberty Media's John Malone and IAC's Barry Diller helped spawn a nasty lawsuit between the moguls. [Silicon Alley Insider]

A certain right-wing blogger has a question for us, via email: "Are all of the contributors to Gawker homosexuals, because there's a level of superciliousness that must be directly tied to sexual frustration and the inability to bond with other human beings." Whoa! We'll have him know that Gawker employs a veritable handful of heterosexuals. This guy was ostensibly upset that our coverage of Absolut's pro-Mexico ad (which the company has now apologized for) was not quite xenophobic enough. But what led this Republican internet soldier to target us in our vulnerable gay spot? It's probably his own past as a gay porn star—that does have a tendency to color one's perceptions.

Remember the Howard Kurtz piece about how the New York Times and the Murdochifying Wall Street Journal have a little war going on, or something? As usual, Kurtz missed/buried the story. The Times refused to comment on bitchy things said by British-import Journal publisher Robert Thomson. But a "Timesman" apparently called up Toronto Life's Spectator blog to give his side. Huh. Maybe he thought his unauthorized comments wouldn't be noticed in a Canadian publication? "Whatever it says on the masthead, Thomson's the editor," Mystery Timesman reports. "He's moved his office next to the news floor." Murdoch will destory journalism!!! There's more off-the-record sniping and gloating, below.

Remember Lauren Cleri, the original terrible "Moment of Truth" contestant who sold out her husband and her marriage on live TV, only to walk away with no money at all? Well FOX has helpfully put a brand new update interview with her on YouTube. Seems she's having some relationship troubles now! Her husband is hurting. She's hurting. Everybody's hurting! But you know what? This experience has helped make her the strong woman that she is today. What hasn't gotten stronger, though: her sense of judgment, for doing this updated interview in the first place. The full video is after the jump.

Chimpanzee Sanctuary Northwest, a chimp-rights group, is assailing Sports Illustrated with a vicious letter-writing campaign! The group is upset that the magazine used a macaque (FANCY WORD FOR "MONKEY") and a bear in its photo shoot for this year's Swimsuit Issue [Folio]. S.I. is like, whoa! We take care of the animals, and besides, what mammal wouldn't be happy nestled up against the thighs of a swimsuit model? The two bear/ model-relations pictures, which have caused all the human outrage, after the jump. The bear does look kind of annoyed by that muzzle.

Working on CBS's Early Show seems a bit like serving time in a Soviet Gulag. No point in befriending anyone, as the ones who don't wish you specific ills may disappear one night without notice. The sad morning show lost another associate producer this week, we hear from a tipster who asked to not even be quoted off the record because CBS is "firing leakers" now. Scary! What's the story? We'll try to explain.

We're not the only ones with a fancy new office! MediaBistro is, we hear from sources close to the listings site and blog concern, moving up to 33rd and Park, which is on the Upper East Side or something, right? Should be a fun commute! FishbowlNY editor Neal Ungerleider won't have to make it, though, as his last day at the site is tomorrow. But! Former Gawker editor Emily Gould is now a contributing editor at MediaBistro publishing site GalleyCat! Busy, busy, busy.

Lehman Brothers' Japan office is under scrutiny for making a little mistake: it lost a $350 million investment in a fraud. They thought the project they were investing in was backed by a reputable Japanese trading house, but it really wasn't. How did the scammers pull off their master plan? With fake stationery and business cards. Yes: somebody showed them some documents with an "official" company seal, handed over that genuine-looking business card, and next thing you know, $350 million! When things like this—or, say, a low-level trader at Societe General losing $7 billion by himself— happen at some of the world's top financial institutions, the impulse is to call those involved idiots or crooks. And sometimes they are. But guess what: getting scammed can be way easier than you think. And that especially goes for journalists!

Air America host Randi Rhodes called Hillary Clinton a whore! Oh nooooooo outrage!! Rhodes, who has always been a cross between an outrageous stand-up comic and a naughty drive-time shock jock, has a regular show on the liberal radio network that no one listens to. The clip of her calling Hillary a whore was taken somewhere or other at some point in time and posted to YouTube by some guy. It's a scandal to those who need to actually pretend to take Randi Rhodes seriously in order to feel outraged about something. Also she calls Geraldine Ferraro a whore but no one cares. Anyway, Air America suspended her. Clip after the jump!

An interesting intellectual exercise: in the absence of new content, how can you keep churning out thousands of words on "Sex And The City" in order to exploit every last bit of misguided interest in the HBO series about four fabulous friends in New York before the movie comes out, giving you another free faux-news hook to exploit for months more? The New York Daily News knows how: by re-imagining the series today. Still a bunch of rich 30-something women or whatever, with one key difference. Now, they would live in the outer boroughs. Revolution!

George Clooney has jokes. His latest celebrity-based antics: a swarm of paparazzi descended upon his house in Italy after a (false) rumor spread that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie were going to be getting married there. Clooney, who was away working, heard about this, and ordered 15 large wedding tables to be set up on the house's lawn. The paps went crazy [Hollyscoop]! Clooney laughed. He's a funny guy. But there's more to this than just a friendly joke. Because George Clooney, one of the biggest celebrities in the world, doesn't just want to make himself chuckle; he wants to undermine the entire celebrity economy that gives him his lofty position in the first place.

Boy, ABC News president David Westin must have really been moved by the story of Randy Pausch, a 47 year-old professor and father who has terminal cancer. It's not every day an exec as high up as Westin takes the time to email the entire ABCTV staff just to talk about an uplifting story! Westin is truly touched by how Pausch has altered our lives. That's one interpretation. Another, more accurate interpretation, which is completely validated by the contents of Westin's email [via Jossip], is that the exec saw a good chance to use this ill man's story as an example of the badass corporate interactivity going on under the Disney umbrella. Westin's totally excited about Pausch's TV segment, sister company Hyperion is publishing the book, and the guy once wanted to be an "Imagineer" for another Disney unit... When he still had his life before him, of course. The full email, after the jump.

LOL! OMG! GIMME UR $$$! Did u kno that big companies are using txt msg lingo as a way to connect to young, hip consumers such as yourself? They totally r! The technique has the double whammy of not only being incredibly annoying in commercials, but also being incredibly annoying to read about in news stories. Particularly in a stodgy old rag like the Wall Street Journal, which is forced by custom and habit to spend a huge portion of the piece explaining to its audience what all these abbreviations mean. It's the same reason that it's annoying to read NYT stories about hip hop, or Washington Post stories about the latest trends in teen fucking. Just let the youth take care of it amongst themselves! NE wayz, these txt lingo ads are a mixed bag, since the necessity of translation cuts down on the desired cool factor. Prime example: this Cingular ad, depicting a situation that would cause a reasonable person to lock their child in the closet:

Kevin Delaney, the Wall Street Journal's Google and Yahoo beat reporter, is decamping from the Valley to New York to take a deputy editor gig at WSJ.com, we hear. A perk of the job: Getting to disclose Google's business relationships with Journal parent company News Corp. in every story.

What did scary media tyrant Rupert Murdoch say at Georgetown today? Allow us to sum up: