If there's one thing that formaldehyde-preserved Post columnist Cindy Adams hates more than things that could not happen "only in New York," it's Poindexter politicos using big words. Like today: "Regulation"?!?! Okay, mumbledy-dumbledy!

The New York Times Co. released its financial results for the first quarter this morning, which are just as bad as expected. Or, more accurately: even worse than expected.

They're not taking it so well.

The Pulitzer Prizes were announced today, and the AP was on hand at various newsrooms to capture the celebration. Even though winning one doesn't matter, we've put together a small gallery of the best photos.

The St. Louis newspaper runs a picture of a black man kissing his white girlfriend; rednecks write racist comments; we mock those comments. Now, the almost-as-bad backlash: the "I'm the least racist!" comment contest:

Now that the fabulous glory of the 2009 Pulitzers—the first ever to include online reporting!— has come and gone, let us reflect on their meaning. Hint: the Pulitzers are just like the newspaper industry!

New York Times columnist Thomas Friedman didn't have a column in yesterday's paper. Was it because the company that his wife's fortune is invested in went bankrupt last week, and he's too sad to type?

As we mentioned, today is Pulitzer day! The winners have started trickling out, and we'll be updating this post as they come in. Keep refreshing it incessantly! Click through for the glory of journalism:

In your foggy Monday media column: Reporters in peril. Institutions crumbling. David Denby and Dan Abrams to the rescue!

Michael Wolff, whose affair with a 28-year-old Vanity Fair intern and subsequent divorce were publicized all over the place, is just thinkin' about Eliot Spitzer, today.

It's Pulitzer day! Our first wild Pulitzer rumor: that the NYT won the 'Breaking News' category for its Eliot Spitzer scandal coverage (sexy!). Heard more Pulitzer rumors? Email us, or put them in the comments.

• The 2009 Pulitzer Prize winners were announced today. [Pulitzer.org]
• It's been six years since the release of The Da Vinci Code, but Knopf says Dan Brown's latest, The Lost Symbol, will hit stores in September. [AP]
• Hollywood agencies Endeavor and William Morris appear to have cemented a merger, although an official announcement is still forthcoming. [THR]
• With the radio business struggling, some commercial stations are now following the lead of public radio and asking for donations. [WSJ]
• 17 Again was No. 1 at the box office with a gross of $24.1 million. [THR]
• Fran Drescher says she's in talks to host a cable TV talk show. The program would cover politics, culture, and health issues, and she claims she's in discussions with MSNBC, PBS, and Oprah Winfrey's OWN. God help us. [USN]

Rubina Ali was plucked from the slums of Mumbai to star in Slumdog Millionaire, which went on to be a smash hit around the world. Too bad absolutely nothing good came of that!

How disturbing and shocking! It seems the Vogue promotion offering new subscribers a free "exclusive red handbag" may be misleading. Although the photo that accompanies the ad shows "a red leather bag with a crocodile embossment and a clasp with over-the-shoulder straps," what actually comes in the mail is a "red canvass bag with 'pleather' handles about the size of a small gym bag." Innocent mix-up or further evidence of budget cutbacks at Condé Nast? You decide! [NYP]

All the cable news networks seek pundits willing to act like absurd political caricatures. This keeps Comedy Central in business. But it turns out Fox News is especially dumb and obvious about the practice.

Pretty-boy cottage blog mogul David Hauslaib has shuttered his flagship gossip site, Jossip. It had been for sale since last March, but apparently no one wants to buy a blog in these worrisome times.

The Chicago Tribune is bankrupt and will lay off 20 percent of its staff on Wednesday. So how is it going to survive? By making its reporters rewrite items from gossip blogs!

I mean can you believe the nerve of this fuckin' guy, coming on CNBC and saying amateurs should follow a proven successful passive investment strategy and shouldn't try to time the market according to the rantings of a man whose stock picks have a losing record? The nerve of this fuckin' guy. Shove your "index funds" up your tight ass!

Cary Tennis: "I like to try new things. It means that often I do not finish old things. I have another thing wrong with me, too. Sometimes I don't like to try new things." What?

We hear rumors that XXL magazine executive publisher Jonathan Rheingold resigned abruptly last night.
UPDATE: A press release just went out confirming this: