• The New York Times is now thinking of charging consumers for access to its web site, although doing so would be "tricky," says Bill Keller. Indeed. [NYT]
• There are some signs of further trouble at Forbes. [NYP]
• Martha Stewart is going to see if she can charge for online videos. [WWD]
• Advertisers are looking to channel recession-related outrage. [NYT]
• NBC has renewed Last Call with Carson Daly. Unfortunately. [THR]
• Did David Geffen really consider taking a stake in the Times? [NYP]
• Jay Leno's last guest on The Tonight Show: Conan O'Brien. [NYDN]
• Suze Orman is having her "moment," in case you weren't aware. [NYT]
• Is the Jon & Kate drama good news or bad news for TLC? [TDB]
• Brian Williams is still a Jersey boy, or so it would seem. [The Awl]

For years, doctors and researchers have stressed the importance of getting eight or nine hours of sleep. Sleep-deprived zombies can take heart in the list of people who do with much less: Barack Obama, for example, says he gets by with just four hours a night and yet he still seems capable of, like, running the country and stuff. (As for whether the same is true for members of Obama's inner circle, well, that's another issue.)

Picture Martha Stewart sitting in the dark, unable to get anything accomplished. It's like the perfect metaphor for how Twitter fails to illuminate the lives of media people!

Michael Bloomberg isn't just a highly gifted musician. He knows how to cook, too! Okay, not really, but he did turn up on the set of Martha Stewart's show yesterday to show off his recipe for "Gracie Mansion" oatmeal cookies. (The episode airs on May 13 if you'd like to go ahead and set your DVR now.) The recipe is free of trans fats, as you probably expected, and you'll find the full recipe below, just in case you're feeling particularly brave this afternoon.

New York has a fancy matrix graphic in which it pretends to identify which Twitterers are insipid or insightful. Oh, New York: Even Twitter's insights are insipid. Today's banalities:

In your bitter Monday media column: Newspaper circulation predictably declines, Martha Stewart is predictably scared of us, old people predictably get conned by media hustlers, and Portfolio's unpredictable burn rate:

Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia has posted a loss the last four out of five years and the stock is now hovering at $3 a share. But you didn't expect any of that to impact Martha's own compensation package, did you? The founder of the now-struggling media company just sealed a new three-year contract that will earn her at least $2 million a year for the next three years, according to a filing with the SEC. She'll also earn a bonus of as much as $1.5 million for each of those years, plus receive a one-time "retention incentive" payment of $3 million. Oh, yea, and then there's that company-funded home delivery and backup power system at her house, which isn't bad either. [WSJ]

A former advertising director at Body + Soul is accusing parent company Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia of firing her because she broke her spine and went on temporary disability. That's cold, even for Martha.

Three New York City Googlers went on Martha Stewart to show off a scallops recipe today. How fun! But Martha was far more interested in their employer's lavish perks.

Martha Stewart, our arch-nemesis, has a few ideas about how to save some money during this recession: buy fewer trees, but more glitter kits. She also demands that you knit her a scarf!

It looks like Fox 5 reporter Arnold Diaz didn't get enough of Martha Stewart the last time he tracked her down. So he decided to go back for some more. This time she's on the hook for chopping people's fingers off thanks to the lounge chairs marketed under her name. We'd love to tell you more, but Arnie's report is proceeded by a big warning that the images are "extremely graphic," and we just ate, but please be our guest. [Fox 5]

Don't even think about turning up at Martha Stewart's house without an invitation, or cutting the power lines to her house in an attempt to force her out into the open. In a filing with the Securities and Exchange Commission, Martha Stewart Omnimedia disclosed that it considers a home security system for Martha's estate as a business expense, and also pays for a "backup power system." Now you know! [WWD]

The Savannah College of Art and Design held its Style Etoile Awards at the James Cohan Gallery on Monday night. The evening's honorees included Russell Simmons, Amanda Burden, Cornelia Guest, Robin Givhan, and William Ivey Long (left), and attendees at the event included Cynthia Rowley, Agnes Gund, Michael Fink, Yigal Azrouël, Mario Buatta, Bobby Zarem, music exec Michael Mauldin and his wife Judy, producer Tom Fontana, SCAD president Paula Wallace, Ann Slater, designer Lars Nilsson, and Russell's brother and girlfriend—Danny Simmons and Julie Henderson. [PMc, Wireimage, WWD, NYSD]

• It's been a busy few days for Valentino. He's taped appearances for Oprah and Martha Stewart; Valentino: The Last Emperor, the new documentary about him, debuts in NYC tomorrow; and it's rumored that despite his very public retirement in early 2008, he remains in charge of his eponymous fashion house. [Fashionologie, WWD, P6]
• What will you find if you visit Valentino's apartment overlooking Central Park? Lots of zebra armchairs and porcelain statues. And air that's "thick with spicy, masculine cologne." Exactly what you pictured, basically. [NYM]

• Kimora Lee Simmons and Djimon Hounsou are married. Sort of. The couple reportedly traveled to Africa last summer to tie the knot in a secret ceremony, but the marriage isn't valid in the US since Kimora was still married to Russell Simmons at the time. But Djimon went shopping for an engagement ring last week, so they'll sort it all out soon enough. [NYDN]
• An escort who claims she serviced Eliot Spitzer has lots of details to share about the encounter, if you're feeling brave this morning. Among other things, she claims he liked to choke her during sex. [R&M]
• Jeffrey Toobin doesn't believe that he's the father of Casey Greenfield's baby, although she's asking for a paternity test to know for sure. [R&M]
• Sarah Silverman and Jimmy Kimmel have split up. Again. [People]

Oh no! Martha Stewart's new chow puppy, Genghis Khan, died in a tragic fire at her breeder's boarding facility. She was so upset that she told Twitter all about it. So how did she cope?

Martha Stewart is mystified by "Notorious B.I.G.," and believes all black people know each other. Kathie Lee Gifford thinks Hoda Kotb was born in Africa. Welcome to post-racial American television!

In your deadly Tuesday media column: Arena is dead, Steven Brill is back to save journalism (with Emily???), the Washington Post tries to cut pay creatively, and our Martha Stewart feud continues:

Martha Stewart's French bulldogs now have their own blog. It's called "The Daily Wag with Francesca and Sharkey." And chunks of it are written in French. Thank us later. [The Daily Wag via Buzzfeed]

• Former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich has landed a six-figure advance to write a book about "his rise and fall, and the dark side of politics." [LAT]
• CBS chief Les Moonves says he no longer has any plans to merge the company's news operations with Time Warner's CNN. [B&C]
• Martha Stewart Living is "broadening its editorial focus" to "beauty, travel and fashion" in order to appeal to advertisers. [Mediaweek]
• Jane Velez-Mitchell's show on Headline News has been doing well. [NYT]
• The Philly Daily News will be folded into the Philadelphia Inquirer. [Gawker]
• Thomson Reuters is launching a new video-on-demand service. [NYT]
• Arena, the 22-year-old British men's style magazine, is no more. [WWD]