In your finally Friday media column: the New York Times "eats crow" (funny joke LOL), the Newseum wins, ASME loses, and police charge Fox with being annoying:

• The publisher of the Los Angeles Times is defending his decision to put an ad disguised as a news story on the front page of the paper yesterday. [LAT]
• A Fox Entertainment employee has reportedly been arrested for stealing the personal information of other Fox employees. [TVN]
• NBC is developing a sitcom based on George Gurley's Observer column. [P6]
• Angelina Jolie, Victoria Beckham and Lauren Conrad were among the "most salable cover faces" for fashion magazines in 2008. The least? Nicole Kidman, Carrie Underwood, and Rachel Weisz. [WWD]
• Dylan Ratigan talks about his departure from CNBC and move to ABC. [BI]
• Speaking of covers, are struggling celebrity tabloids paying for them? [NYP]
• The Daily Beast, Tina Brown's website, will introduce ads shortly. [AdAge]
• Fox News chairman Roger Ailes and his wife, Elizabeth, have purchased another local newspaper in Putnam County. [Portfolio]
• NBC will air a "comedy showcase" featuring Jay Leno on May 19. [NYT]

In your sad, macho Thursday media column: Boston Globe anger, broke-ass papers resign themselves to advertorial disgrace, media money evaporates, and let's all laugh at Politico:

• The LA Times ran an ad designed to look like an actual news story on the front page of the paper today. Much criticism has followed, obvs. [ATD, E&P]
• The NYT is asking its reporters to come up with cost-cutting ideas. [NYO]
• A Chicago-based Good Morning America staffer was given the boot after he tried to put his nose job on his corporate credit card. [P6]
• The acquisition of the Wall Street Journal was a giant misstep for News Corp., but Fox News is making Rupert Murdoch some money. [Reuters]
• Cablevision's Jim Dolan earned a $12.5 million pay package last year. [AP]
• Time Warner's Jeff Bewkes raked in $19.9 million in 2008. [MC]
• The 15 top moneymakers on primetime television. [Forbes]
• Barely-living Blackbook is now refusing to pay some freelancers. [Jossip]

OK! Magazine has had some issues with Photoshop on their cover before. This week, they show how amputating a leg may be the easiest and fastest way to lose 90 pounds. Diet secrets revealed, indeed.

In your swashbuckling Wednesday media column: XXL-Giant feud update, NPR infighting, nobody's scared of ASME, the Boston Globe is mad, son, and dead goats save newspapers:

• To celebrate 1,000 episodes (and 35,892 sound effects), CNBC's resident buffoon, Jim Cramer, rang the opening bell of the NYSE today. [CNBC]
• Sales of romance novels are on the rise, since in times like these, we all just want to indulge in happy endings. Or something along those lines. [NYT]
• Why is the New York Times Co. frantically looking to cut costs at the Boston Globe? For one thing, it's on track to lose $85 million in 2009. [NYO, Portfolio]
• It's hard getting people to pay for newspaper content they now get for free. Let Coke guide you, Arthur Sulzberger Jr.: "Coca-Cola took tap water, filtered it and called it Dasani, and makes millions of dollars a year." [NYT]
• Magazines are blurring the line between editorial and advertising by putting ads on the cover. If they don't, they go bust. Rock, meet hard place. [NYT]

Kate Ahlborn—Harvard '07, Upper East Sider, Vanity Fair writer—ventured into Brooklyn, where dirty people live, for a weird Brooklyny art show, and wrote about it. May she never fucking return.

• Boston Globe staffers are still reacting to the news that the New York Times Co. may shutter the paper in 30 days if certain pay concessions aren't met. The paper announced it plans to raise newsstand prices, and a small group of staffers staged a rally last night in support of the paper. [E&P, WCVB]
• Peter Bart is denying claims he was ousted as Variety's editor. [NYT]
• The AP says that sites that use the company's content will have to obtain permission and share revenue with them, or they'll face "legal action." [NYT]
• Keith Olbermann aired a eulogy for his mom on last night's show. [HP]
• For his part, O'Reilly wasn't too cool with pics of two men kissing. [Gawker]
• Thomson Reuters chief Tom Glocer riffs on the future of the Times. [NYO]
• You can now watch NBC while sitting on PATH trains. Thrilling! [MW]
• Even more thrilling: Playboy has launched its redesigned website. [BR, Folio]

Longtime Variety editor Peter Bart was finally replaced last weekend—a move that we (and others) interpreted as Bart being, essentially, stripped of his power to make way for new blood. Not true, he says!

Haha, Nylon magazine has hit upon a "novel" solution to save money, if "novel" means "kind of like a big scam." It's *informing* subscribers that they'll now be getting their issues in digital format. Okay?

Whoa now, magazines are fighting dirty! Advertising is scarce. Magazines have that hungry look. The rules are gone. So one title (Update: or someone pretending to be) is telling advertisers a competitor's folding. HARDCORE!

This is Nina Willdorf, currently the editor-in-chief of Budget Travel. Do you know anything about her? We're looking for info from those who've worked with her. We keep hearing stories.

The magazine industry had sincere, desperate hopes that Michelle Obama could be the next Princess Di, moving copies automatically with her smile. Not gonna happen. But following these simple Michelle Magazine Cover Rules can help:

In your deluged Monday media column: Conde's heartbreaking receptionist layoff, the Miami Herald is JUST FINE, Lee Abrams is a cuddly animal, and Iceland is so touchy:

• The New York Times Co. says it will shut down the Boston Globe within a month unless the paper's unions agree to $20 million in concessions. [BN]
• Fox News gossip columnist Roger Friedman got axed after he reviewed a pirated version of Fox's new X-Men movie, Wolverine. [DHD, NYT]
• Vanity Fair is scrapping its annual "green issue." [Independent]
• Michelle Obama may be beloved by the media world, but she isn't a sure thing when it comes to selling magazines on newsstands, apparently. [AdAge]
• Playboy's former fashion director is suing the mag for discrimination. [NYP]
• Hearst's Country Living is launching a line of products. [MW]
• Michael Crichton died last November, but two more novels by the best-selling author will be published over the next year and a half. [NYT]
• Eliot Spitzer was on the Today show this morn, in case you missed it. [Jossip]
• Fast & Furious was No. 1 at the box office this past weekend. [THR]

What sort of fucker is Vanity Fair's George Washingtonesque editor Graydon Carter? An amazing one, according to a man who once stayed in a hotel room directly under his, listening:

Paparazzi life is war! Two photographers who were trying to photograph Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen's wedding ceremony in Costa Rica say the couple's bodyguards shattered their car window. With a bullet, from a gun!

In your temporarily de-Nolanated Friday media column: Hearst learns that investigations don't require ink, a lefty New York radio station gets locked out, Bill Keller's irony goes unappreciated, and Andrew Sullivan gets some help.

Si Newhouse Jr. ordered more layoffs at Condé Nast last month; receptionists and online writers were promptly fired. But the magazine honcho apparently doesn't mind adding another Newhouse to the payroll.