In your explosive Thursday media column: Iceland's bad bet, the wienermobile is the future of journalism, more hard times at USA Today, Conde Nast would like to be the new Wonkette, and a scary scene at Fashion Week.

The following email just went out to Time Inc. staffers, informing them that People StyleWatch publisher Michelle Meyers has quit, for unexplained reasons. Know more? Email us.

• The New York Times Co. actually turned a profit in 2009. Glory be! [NYT]
• Did you read (or hear about) Playboy's new interview with John Mayer, the one in which he managed to make himself look like even more of an idiot? Mayer's been busy today apologizing for his comments, not surprisingly.
• American Idol's ratings were up big last night. It's the Ellen effect. [TVG]
• Get ready to see ads on magazine covers; it's so happening. [AdAge]
• Another symptom of the times: While Gourmet didn't survive the great magazine meltdown, Food Network Magazine continues to be a big hit. [NYP]
• Since MTV no longer has any connection to music whatsoever, it's changed its logo. The "music television" bit is gone. And the logo has put on weight. [BC]
• The next Spider Man installment—coming July 3, 2012, just in case you happen to have your calendar in front of you—will be in 3D. Naturally. [THR]
• Speaking of things in the far-off future, Tom Cruise has signed on to star in Mission Impossible IV (coming May '11!). And in what will undoubtedly come as the best news you'll hear all week, Celine Dion returns to Las Vegas in '11.

In your blizzardy Wednesday media column: Luke Russert does it the Luke Russert way, the NYT has no iPad comment, a new journalism moneymaking scheme, and David Remnick acts so haughty you'd think he runs America's best magazine or something.

Sports Illustrated was the first magazine to make a splash with a demo on a tablet computer; now, Interview has rolled out its own iPad demo. Looks good! Check back in six months to see if anyone uses it. [HuffPo]

In your brainstorming Tuesday media column: better journalism through crack, a Bob Schieffer vacation, Hugh Hefner gets sued, a star-studded media kid bar mitzvah, and newspapers discover a rich new source of advertising.

• Super Bowl XLIV made history last night: It's now the most-watched TV program in U.S. history, having bypassed the finale of M*A*S*H in 1983. [THR]
• Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt have filed suit against the Rupert Murdoch's News of the World for reporting the couple was separating. [Guardian]
• Talks between Fox and Conan O'Brien seem to be moving ahead. As for the Super Bowl ad featuring Letterman and Leno, Letterman was reportedly interested in having Conan appear as well, although it didn't pan out.
• Ellen DeGeneres makes her debut on American Idol tomorrow. Meanwhile, talks to have Howard Stern replace Simon Cowell next season are progressing.
• Mixed news for the magazine business: newsstand sales fell in the second half of 2009, although the situation was even worse a year ago. [NYT, AdAge]
• Sarah Palin won't have to fly to NYC to tape her appearances on Fox News: The network is building its new "contributor" a TV set in her living room. [NYT]
• After dominating the box office for seven weeks, Avatar was dethroned by Dear John this weekend, although it remained No. 1 internationally. [MTV]
• Ads for Snickers, Doritos, and Google were big winners with Super Bowl viewers this year. As for the Motorola spot starring Megan Fox, she may be the first person in history to have had a "thumb double." [Reuters, NYT, NYM]

In your Byzantine Monday media column: searching for a rich media savior, a recipe duplication scandal, the future of robot media is $1 per hour, and STEPHEN A. SMITH is back in your area code.

The US magazine circulation figures for the second half of 2009 are in. And grim! The big losers (and a winner), below.

• Condé Nast Publications exists no more. The company will now be known simply as "Condé Nast," since the powers that be there have finally realized that people like to read stuff on the Internet every once in a while. [NYP]
• Bill O'Reilly invited Jon Stewart on his show this week. (Bold!) Unfortunately, all of Stewart's good jabs were edited out. (Not surprising!) [Gawker, NYT]
• Keith Olbermann is feuding with journalists and bloggers. Once again. [HP]
• Fashion mags struggled during the second half of '09: Sales of Vogue and Marie Claire fell by 15%, while Elle and Harper's Bazaar were flat. [NYM]
• Exits: Lifetime CEO Andrea Wong has been ousted from the network amid lackluster ratings. And the president of TV Guide Network is stepping down.
• Rumor has it Howard Stern may replace Simon Cowell on Idol. [P6, LAT]
• The cover of the new issue of SI has some people hot and bothered. [LAT]
• Magazines that tried cutting prices to boost sales? It didn't work. [AdAge]
• A rundown of the ads you can expect to see on Super Bowl Sunday. [ABC]
• Last Sunday's Grammy Awards boosted music sales this past week. [LAT]
• The Oscars are officially a month away. Mark your calendar. [The Wrap]

In your foreboding Thursday media column: Jared Kushner has a bright idea, Howard Zinn's reputation impugned, David Letterman plays a funny joke, and Janice Min somehow survives being rich as fuck.

Zac Posen lost his shit because Harper's Bazaar wanted him to stand next to Sesame Street's The Count in a fashion shoot. It was the only way he could get into the magazine "as a non-advertiser," EIC Glenda Bailey said.

Peggy Wilkins is an average heterosexual 45 year-old Chicago woman who had to rent an entire apartment above her own to hold her massive, encyclopedic Playboy collection. Gurl U no U always B our friend. [Chicago Reader via Romenesko]

In your slushy Wednesday media column: Keith Olbermann sniffs out media bias whether it exists or not, a way to save magazines in fantasyland, PARADE's editor leaves, and Air America totally owes media people money.

• Jon Stewart will face off against Bill O'Reilly when he enters the "No Spin Zone" tomorrow evening. In somewhat related news, pedicure-loving ex-congressman (and wanna-be Senator) Harold Ford hit Colbert last night.
• Is the magazine industry on the verge of a turnaround? Let's hope so! [AA]
• TV news: ABC is thinking of moving The View to the afternoon; Fox confirms it's had "conversations" with Conan about a late-night show, but hasn't had any real "negotiations"; and Matthew Broderick may be coming to the small screen.
• Layoffs: Big cuts went down at CBS News yesterday afternoon. And Sony Pictures has announced that it's cutting 450 positions at the studio.
• For the first time in a long time, CNN has surpassed MSNBC in primetime. Neither network is close to catching up with Fox News, though. [Politico, LAT]
• A reality show about The Oprah Winfrey Show is coming to Oprah's new cable channel next January. The network will also be home to shows about imprisoned women, "miracle detectives," and workaholic parents. [NYT]
• News Corp. is in talks with James Cameron about an Avatar sequel. [THR]
• Did you catch the New York Post's "prosti-dude" story today? Some staffers at the paper were a little less than thrilled with the PR stunt, it seems. [Gawker]
• Condé Nast's new fraud hotline should make ratting out co-workers (for stealing office supplies, expensing meals with friends, etc.) much easier! [NYP]
• More on this morning's Oscar nominations. [THR, NYT, TE, LAT]
• Meet Hollywood's top 40 moneymakers for 2009. [Vanity Fair]

In your staggering Tuesday media column: Marcus Brauchli is far richer than a newspaper editor should be (especially considering the new classified ad numbers), the future of Harper's debated, and Julia Allison overcomes media haters (like Richard Lawson).

Which fact is more befuddling: (1.) Though Sarah Palin: The Untold Story ...In Her Own Words! is written in the first person, it was made with zero input from Palin. (2.) This magazine is expected to make money.

In your musk-scented Monday media column: A use found for print media, the Harper's editor firing saga continues, small stakes mean big arguments in journalism academia, and Howell Raines returns.

This morning, New York editor Adam Moss lost deputy editor Hugo Lindgren to Bloomberg BusinessWeek. He's certainly not the only magazine-world EIC to have a trusted confidante on staff. But they're a dying breed.

In your shiny Thursday media column: internecine squabbling at the Washington Post (is fun), new hires at the WSJ, The University of Florida is a Mac, and the government has always run the media.