Things are getting bad down Tila Tequila way. Claudia Schiffer needs a prayer. And there's gay marriage in a certain Mad Men actor's future. Yes, it's your Tuesday morning gossip roundup!

Our favorite retro drama may not have made it to the Summer of Love yet, but it's preparing with the Summer of First Base in this veritable snogapalooza. Pucker up, because August has everyone randy in 1963.

Remember on last week's Mad Men where a British ad man got his foot run over with a lawn mower? Well, the gossip is that he is based on one of Mathew Weiner's mortal enemies, but who?

Of course the moment that everyone will remember is when Don Draper got donkey punched by a bunch of drugged out kids, but it was the series of silent vignettes that really made this episode different.

Many things happened last night on Mad Men, but the one that everyone will remember was when poor, poor Englishman Guy got his foot run over by a John Deere tractor. In fact, it was a bloody good show.

The world's absolutely abuzz over news about the Emmy Awards, which are kind of like television's Oscars and very important. In case you missed them, here are some things you should know about the winners, the losers and the critics.

That's because Mad Men and 30 Rock will take the big prizes. For the second year in a row, shows we actually like are poised to take home the gold. Neil Patrick Harris is hosting too!

The creepiest thing about Betty Draper giving birth was not knowing that she was birthing what will inevitably become another messed up human, but that the whole ordeal looked like an alien abduction. Oh, and there was racism too!

Have you already forgotten Sunday's episode of Mad Men? We haven't. It had all the ingredients of a Russian novel: sad families, death, and bad Ann-Margret imitators. Also like Dostoevsky, we learned five new ways we can fail our parents.

• NBC plans to deliver its programming to gas stations. So if you don't tune into Jay Leno voluntarily, you may be forced to do so while you pump gas. [MC]
• Mad Men has been renewed for a fourth season, not surprisingly. [NYT]
• Freedom Communications, the company that publishes the Orange County Register, among other newspapers, has filed for bankruptcy protection [E&P]
• Magazines are having trouble selling copies on newsstands, so now they're going to focus on getting you to sign up for subscriptions. [NYT]
• Don't be surprised when you see Tony Bourdain whip out his Chase Visa card to pay for meals on his Travel Channel show. It's now part of his job. [AdAge]
• The show goes on for Plum TV, the "resort and luxury lifestyle TV network." The company just raised another $5 million from investors. [PC]
• Rachel Maddow says she had swine flu! But she went to the doctor, got "the special swine flu drugs," and is all better now, thankfully. [HP]

There'll be no Mad Men renewal-cliffhanger this year: AMC's announced it's ordering a fourth season.

While we weren't loving last night's uneven season finale of Weeds, we were loving Nancy Botwin's parenting skills—or lack thereof. Who wants to be raised by a boring stroller-pusher when you can have someone to bring the crazy?

Last night's episode of Mad Men was like a perfectly-rolled joint: tight, slow burning, and leaving everyone completely satisfied. There wasn't a lack of things harshing our mellow, but here are the five overarching themes of this beautifully constructed hour.

Heidi Montag wants to be impregnated. Bethenny Frankel wants new friends. And Martha's Vineyard wants to see Chelsea Clinton wear white. Good morning! It's Monday's Gossip Roundup!

Mad Men, the famous and brilliant television show about how it was weird and bad but also secretly really fucking awesome when dudes smoked and drank at work while treating women like shit (and everyone dressed better but there were no black people), was incessantly hyped by every wing of the East Coast Liberal Media Elite for weeks before its new season started, and the premiere drew 2.8 million viewers.

Don and Roger both deal with dramatic changes to their home life, Ken goes on the offensive against Pete, the Brits ruin everything, and Peggy got laid. We always knew she'd be good in the sack.

Last night the latest piece of business to drop into the offices of Mad Men's Sterling Cooper was Patio, the diet soda with possibly the worst name ever. Turns out Pepsi actually made the stuff back in 1963.

We noticed something queer about Mad Men this week. Well, actually, it was on last week's episode — and it has us scratching our heads over AMC's gay-related anxiety levels.

When it comes to plot details, producers of Mad Men are as tight lipped as an Olsen twin at an all-you-can-eat buffet. So, what happens in episode two three? One phrase: "I'm Peggy Olson and I want to smoke marijuana."

• Controversial right-wing columnist Robert Novak is dead at 78. [NYT]
• Sunday's hyped-up premiere of Mad Men attracted lots more viewers, as expected. Some 2.8 million people tuned in, up 33% from last year. [Reuters]
• Struggling studio MGM has dumped its CEO and hired a new one. [WSJ]
• Is Sam Zell going to walk away from Tribune? That's the rumor. [NYP]
• The president will speak at next month's Walter Cronkite memorial. [NYT]
• Steven Spielberg's new movie studio now has $825 million in the bank. The company says it plans to make 21 movies over the next four years. [WSJ]
• It looks like MySpace is buying the site iLike for "around $20 million." [DB]
• Newsday is under fire after rejecting an ad by the Tennis Channel that happened to be critical of the newspaper's parent company, Cablevision. [NYT]
• Irony alert: BusinessWeek, the struggling business mag desperately seeking a buyer, just launched a new website called "The Case for Optimism." [BW]