Patrick Moberg isn't the only American Apparel-clad, authentic dimpled pony finding love underground. Yesterday on the F train, listening to "Bankrupt on Selling" on my iPod Touch, I encountered my inamorata. She was eating noodles out of a styrofoam container. Her shift dress had turquoise feathers on it and dreamcatchers. She was clipping her nails! Screwing my courage to my sticking point, I just screwed up. By the time I approached her, she had faded into the anonymity of the East Broadway F stop. I hope she uses the internet and Facebook!

Illustrator Patrick Moberg saw the "New York Girl" of his "Dreams" on the subway last night and promptly made this webpage featuring a whimsical little sketch of her. She had "fancy braided hair" and "blue gym shorts" and was "writing in a journal" on the 5 train from Union Square to Bowling Green. Patrick describes himself as "skinny" and "not insane," a few inches above the spot on the page where he lists his email and phone number on the internet. It's like a Miranda July story mixed with Craigslist Missed Connections mixed with stalking mixed with everything that's wrong (and right!) about Boys Today. I'm confused about my feelings!

Do you have some ish to deal with? Are mens not on your level? Tionna Tee Smalls, famous blogger and author of Girl, Get Your Mind Right, is here to help. Email her at asktionna@gawker.com.

Tired of dealing with your ish all by yourself? Starting right now, you can ask Tionna Tee Smalls, the author of Girl, Get Your Mind Right, and of the blog Talk Dat Ish, about love, relationships, life, and who is the best contestant on 'Making The Band.' We finally found an advice columnist! (She was in Brooklyn.)

In the spirit of the season, the Times and the Journal have gotten together (in the sense of publishing separate articles) to tell you that if you're in love with someone, you're basically nuts. And who better to share that joy than frequent Dave Zinczenko co-expert—on "The Today Show," at least, as we can't speak to her private life—Dr. Helen Fisher!

New York men continue to see only 1 very awesome side.

Who knew skipping Freshman Comp could stand in the way of finding true love?