The "I Hate The New Facebook" group is up to 1.4 million members. Facebook plans to make its redesign permanent next week anyway. That rebuff won't hamper Facebook's popularity, or discourage the creation of new groups motivated by the urge to whine. Starting a group on Facebook is the millennial generation's preferred act of protest, but not because the students who create them hope to change anything. They are popular because, since preschool, my fellow millennials and I — very special snowflakes, all of us — have been told that it's not if you win or lose, or even how you play the game. It's that you participate.We millennials know there are two things we can do about weighty problems like the Sudan, Iraq and HIV/AIDS: Start a Facebook group, or mock those who do. I'm not about to start a Facebook group. Forthwith, a list of Facebook groups that never achieved their creator's ambitions to become "one million strong" — though I'm sure coach will give them a plastic trophy at the end of the season anyway.

More exciting news for the music industry: last year, 48% of all teenagers purchased zero CDs [LA Times]. That's up from 38% in 2006. Yes, more kids are buying music online, but not enough to make up for the drop in CD sales. And illegal downloads are also becoming more popular. The Times worries that "Going to the mall to buy music may no longer be a rite of passage for adolescents." So what are all the teens doing with their free time now that they aren't wandering through Sam Goody in search of the latest Christina Aguilera album? One word: Jenkem.

Another celebrity's potty-mouthed racism has been exposed, blah blah blah—especially since we're not sure that "Dog" the Bounty Hunter, the latest "gotcha" tabloid victim, really qualifies as such? However, we are impressed by his ability to so alienate his son that the kid has no problem selling a tape he made of his dad being a total prick on the phone to a tabloid for wads of cash. It's the new thing! Getting parental revenge, Ireland Baldwin-style.

Remember being underage? We barely do! We do recall that each attempt to go to a bar or club, or even to buy a nice bottle of Night Train, was a real test of mettle. Would the bouncer realize that New Hampshire was spelled wrong on the fake ID? Or that we weren't 43? Kids these days get off easy. Yesterday we got a tip to check out a hot party last night at the Chelsea club Retox. The party was being thrown by a promoter named James B. "No ID issues!" his email promised claims a promotion spread by a Facebooker, and "Free drinks!" This was echoed on James B.'s MySpace page like so: "EMAIL or Call me if you have any ID issues-Dont be shy." The party, he wrote, would be extra fun for the "Class of '10 especially." [Update: Sorry, that last line was from our correspondent, not James B. or the young lady on Facebook.]