Just a few weeks ago, I would have said Glee needed a twelve step program, but these days it looks like it's well on its way to recovery. Yes, the show had to get completely wasted to give us one of its best episodes in a long time.

Ke$ha's glitter-squirting vagina has crossover porn appeal. LiLo seeks no-jail plea deal. John Travolta gets a male waiter's phone number. Prince snubs Diddy. Britney Spears dreams of "running with lions." TGIFriday gossip.

Well Ke$ha has gone and done it again. This new video, brought to you by Funny or Die, is a spoof on Disney- complete with cartoon rats bathing in Jack and Evil Mirror-Queen "sluts." Watch if you dare.

Kim Kardashian wants to impart some serious life lessons to the young girls of America, because she's qualified to do so. Also today: Tom Brady needs surgery and Halle Berry really likes to yell a lot at her ex-boyfriend.

Oh my god cringe city. CRINGE CITY. These girls changed the lyrics from the trashy sin-celebrating "Tik Tok" to something more god-appeasing. But it's not okay. NOBODY IS AMUSED. Awkward, inappropriate teen sinners inside.

Ke$ha sends her warmest wishes to you in this inspirational holiday video message all the way from Moscow. Stay classy girl!

[Just a regular night out for Ke$ha, a bog beast who pulled herself up by the bootstraps and into the bright light of Hollywood. But her heart never left the marshland. Image via Splash.]

[Ke$ha, the pop star that drizzled out of Lady Gaga's jock strap, was styled to resemble an early '90s fad trinket at last night's Us Weekly Hot Hollywood party. More fascinating Ke$ha pictures after the jump.]

[Ke$ha, the illiterate pop star the music industry created from Lady Gaga's afterbirth, films a promo for self-proclaimed "pride anthem" single "We R Who We R." Updated caption inspired by OMG! Ponies! Image via Pacific Coast News.]

[Ke$ha wears a mask en route to a New York spa. Image via INF.]

Someone on Mischa's yacht is a mole—is no starlet in St. Tropez is safe? Christina Ricci says Rob Pattinson is an "awesome" kisser. Ke$ha was a band geek. Hilary Duff is getting hitched. TGIFriday gossip.

As the Winslet-Mendes marriage fell apart, Kate "freaked out" over her Mendes-directed sex scenes with Leonardo. Snooki on sobering up in jail: "It happens to the best of us." Tuesday gossip is a matter of opinion.

Before Ke$ha spread glitter all over America, Brooklyn-based electropop trio Tayisha Busay was spreading it all over NYC, like in this WTF-worthy (in the most fun sense of the word) video for their single, "WTF You Doin' In My Mouth?"

@AngelinaJolie doesn't have followers yet—who will be the first? Paris Hilton denies doing a Nazi salute. Justin Bieber's life saved by a Segway. Ke$ha has a spanking fetish. Tuesday gossip is one tweet away from your best friend.

The dancing soldier YouTube meme has been banished from the Israel Defense Forces. Armed soldiers who danced to Ke$ha's "Tik Tok" in Hebron have been ordered to make a public service video to prevent future dancing soldier videos. [Awl, Mashable]

On Wednesday's installment of The Daily Ten, Ke$ha explained to Michael Yo that her ideal man is both burly and beard-y.

Lindsay's "fuck u" manicure was "a joke," but her Cato Institute-quoting tweets aren't. New Mel Gibson tapes apparently show him telling Oksana she "deserved" physical abuse. Ryan Seacrest's beard commits—with sexy photos? Thursday gossip speaks truth to power.

Because of the riot at last week's South Street Seaport concert for Hanson and rapper Drake, organizers have cancelled two more concerts including one by horrible pop act Ke$ha. We never thought we'd say this, but thanks Hanson!

[Ke$ha does something, somewhere. Image via Splash]

Lindsay's alcohol education deadline is up, and she's three classes behind and in Cannes. The Jonas Brothers get trapped in an elevator and escape only because they are thin. Courtney Love had sex with Kate Moss. Thursday's gossip has arrived.