What happened on Day 1 of Britain’s epic phone-hacking trial? Let’s see:

The most surprising aspect of Forbes' list of the world's highest paid models is that the names here don't make more money. Considering that DJ Pauly D earned $13 million within the very same time frame, the $7.2 million second-highest-grossing figure Miranda Kerr brought in seems low. Also, no Kate Upton.

Anyone concerned that the upcoming Olympics would focus too much on sports and not enough on haute couture fashion can breathe a sigh of relief – the roster of performers for the closing ceremony was revealed Monday, and Kate Moss is prominently featured.

As current beef goes, this one is almost as lame as The Weeknd saying that The-Dream looks like the Hamburglar on Twitter, but public name-calling is public name-calling, and so we will share this particularly stupid incident with you: Piers Morgan, CNN's premier ruddy-faced gasbag, is still really pissed at Kate Moss.

Fashionista is running a series on "Fashion Intern Horror Stories," and the best one—about the world's "best known supermodel" peeing all over a white suit—makes for a workable blind item:

John Galliano, the Dior designer who was found guilty of hate speech for his anti-Semitic rant in a Paris bar and fired from both Dior and his John Galliano label, is about to be welcomed back to the fashion fold. How can we tell? The sympathetic quotes are piling up.

Royal horror: Pippa Middle got into an upskirt photo situation at London Fashion Week. Now, the simplest way to avoid an upskirt photograph is to wear longer skirts or pants. (Or live in a world with civility. Hah! Right.) Unfortunately, starlets live in a world where the skirts are short, the cars are fancy and difficult to climb out of, and cameras are everywhere. Consequently, starlets' vaginas are in perpetual peril. How do they deal with this? Now presenting the Seven Highly Effective Habits of Starlets With Cameras Pointed Up Their Skirts.

Megan Fox reassures the world that she is neither robot nor android. Underlings must "turn their faces to a wall" when Madonna walks by. Jane Lynch started smoking at the age of 12. Demi Moore tweets a "topless" picture. Tuesday gossip is practicing human emotions.

Tina Fey has another daughter. Kate Moss' wedding pictures are here. Mel Gibson wants to see more of his kid. Vote for Saturday gossip in the Ames Straw Poll!

To prove just how rich and famous and European she is, Kate Moss is currently on vacation in the south of France and jumped off a yacht—topless. Over there, it's nothing major, but in puritanical America this is horribly scandalous. Toplessness! In public! How dare you!

Everyone's getting a divorce! Literally, everyone, except for Kate Moss, who just got married. And Salma Hayek's not getting a divorce yet, but finding out her husband fathered Linda Evangelista's kid isn't going to make her marriage stronger. Yes! It's Saturday gossip.

Kate Moss is supposedly marrying The Kills' Jamie Hince this weekend in a super secret ceremony. (Do the rich and famous have any other kind?) One secret that's leaked out, though, is that embattled fashion designer John Galliano is—reportedly—designing her dress. Gasp!

Lars von Trier is "doing [his] best" to satiate his leading lady's appetite for porn. Woody Allen says he wants to fuck all of his leading ladies. Zsa Zsa Gabor falls into a coma. Janice Dickinson loses her teeth. Thursday gossip takes a Nazi pervert at his word.

Kate Moss stole the Louis Vuitton runway show in Paris today by lighting up a cigarette on the runway during the finale. It's amazing that all it takes to be the ultimate rebel these days is to smoke tobacco in public.

Misery Bear just wants to bring meaning to his life by raising money for charity. He finally finds compassion in Kate Moss but he doesn't realize she's about to go Kathy Bates, a la Misery, on his ass.

As they say, one man's trash is another man's treasure, right?

[Kate Moss lunches with mother Linda Rosina in London. Add this to the "preternaturally attractive mother/daughter duos" file that we started yesterday. Image via Bauer-Griffin.]

Does Tom Cruise have a crush on Jeremy Renner? Are Kat Von D and Jesse James engaged? Was Shape wrong to put LeAnn Rimes on their cover? Friday gossip is full of perplexing questions.

When celebrities get mad at journalists, they throw cellphones, curse them on out TV, and kick them in the leg—twice!—at fancy fashion parties. That's what Larry King replacement Piers Morgan says Kate Moss did to him last winter.

A surprisingly detailed (but possibly fake) story about Kate marrying her rockstar boyfriend. Snooki plans her Halloween costume: A pickle. Christina Aguilera files for divorce. Jesse James and Kat Von D are on the rocks. TGIFriday gossip.