E! Entertainment Television announced today it has signed the Kardashian Klan to an unprecedented three-year, $40 million contract that guarantees at least three more season of the reality TV show family's flagship series, Keeping Up With the Kardashians.

Ashley Smith directs an adorable Kanye West stand-in named Caleb (AKA Kanye's son) in the unofficial video for "Way Too Cold" (formerly known as Theraflu).

President Obama hasn't changed his mind: He still thinks Kanye West is a jackass.

The fame cycle is complete: Following their much-watched Date of the Century, Kanye West has agreed to appear on the upcoming season of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, Radar Online reports.

Yesterday, Kim Kardashian was spotted with something that may have been a hickey. Today, TMZ reports that it totally is with the eye-grabbing headline, "HICKEY CONFIRMATION." Kim ostensibly earned this hickey from Kanye West, some time after seeing The Hunger Games but before eating pizza. (The timeline is still rough — stay glued to TMZ for updates.)

The Date of the Century may be over, but its memory lives on. Kim Kardashian wandered New York City today with what looked like a hickey on her neck. Might have been psoriasis, though.

Important update on The Date of the Century: After their movie date to The Hunger Games last night—but before the sleepover that led to a Pizza Goat-approved lunch date and shopping trip—Kim Kardashian and Kanye West stayed "as close and intimate as they could" at Sleep No More, that interactive theater thing with the naked people and sex masks.

TMZ is doing minute-by-minute coverage of Kim Kardashian's 24-hour date with Kanye West. With news this big, I do feel it is my obligation as a journalist to help disseminate the fact that Kim and Kanye just finished eating lunch at Serafina, a restaurant the Amazing Pizza Goat once enjoyed. Then they got into a chauffeured car and went to FAO Schwartz.

Amid rumors that Kim Kardashian is dating Kanye West, TMZ and The Daily Mail have published photos of Kim leaving Kanye's apartment bulding this morning, in the same outfit she wore to the movies with him last night. This is the biggest breaking news since whatever guy Kim Kardashian slept with before Kanye West.

The gossip mercenaries at TMZ are reporting that Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are "dating for real," and went on a movie date to see The Hunger Games last night. This fascinating development raises the following questions:

In today's second edition of "Don't Make That Rap Video," Katy Perry covered Kanye and Jay-Z's "Niggas in Paris" over the weekend. It is obviously horrible, but it did leave us with a fascinating chicken-or-egg question: Did Katy Perry beget Karmin, the white-people-rappin' duo featuring Perry doppelganger Amy Heidemann on vocals, or did Karmin's insufferable covers beget Katy Perry trying to be more like Karmin?

Since Seth's departure last Thursday, there have been many articles written that suggest he was fired specifically for making a "racist" slur in his post. There was this headline. And this one. And this one. That's just not true.

If you've been anywhere near Twitter this evening, you know something truly wonderful and unique and amazing and THE BEST is happening. In the space of two hours, Kanye West has tweeted 60 times and counting on, uh, his earnest pursuits in the realm of fashion and graphic design and nutrition and architecture and video games and publicity and medicine and law and science and app guys. You think Tom Ford is full of himself? Kanye West shits Tom Fords for breakfast. Then he irons out the shits into cutting-edge fabrics, and frantically cuts, sews, and laces that fabric through the night and into the morning, until he has produced the most unbelievable clothes — nay, FASHION + ART = FARTSHION! — in the universe. And he calls these clothes DONDA. But he calls all that other stuff DONDA, too! DONDA will be your everything. Just you wait and see. And what is DONDA? It's an acronym for Dis Original N***a Dresses Aight.*

What the world has been missing lately is a big, all-stars-on-deck charity single to benefit a needy cause (casual racism optional). So we're really glad that Kanye West, Kim Kardashian, Diddy, Chris Brown, Floyd Mayweather (Floyd Mayweather?) and others have joined together to release the "Megaupload Mega Song," to benefit the, uh, charitable cause of, well, a file-sharing site.

The Grammy Awards nominations were announced on Wednesday night! Hooray! Everyone loves the Grammys. They're like the Oscars for blind people. And your mom's entire iPod was nominated. Here are the nominees. Congrats, Skrillex! Exchange bitcoins accordingly.

Jay-Z confirms your suspicions about Kanye West. Brad Pitt wants to quit acting in "three years." Demi Lovato goes to a wedding and catches the bouquet. Lindsay Lohan returns to the nightlife scene. Monday gossip gets upstaged.

Tom Cruise's Rock of Ages dance training was a revelation. Dr. Conrad Murray is on suicide watch. Amber Rose says Kim Kardashian totally banged Kanye. Pregnant Jessica Simpson "crave[s] cantaloupe like a crazy person." Tuesday gossip can't control its urges.

Why did Kris Humphries ditch his wedding ring to carry moving boxes? Shiloh Jolie-Pitt and Kingston Rossdale might be in love. Dina Lohan is shopping a memoir. Kanye's Occupy Wall Street outfit was worth more than $30,000. TGIFriday gossip.

Ashton's hot blonde lover tells all. Kristen Stewart says her teachers failed her. Beyonce says her bump is real. Rashida Jones poses in bunny ears and calls penises "unsexy." Wednesday gossip lasts for hours.

Demi and Ashton go camping and yell at a photographer. After occupying Wall Street, Kanye West went shopping. Jessica Simpson rubs her possibly-pregnant belly. Paz de la Huerta considers herself "one of the rare artists that are left." Tuesday gossip atones.