Everyone's favorite over-allusive Indiewood hit Juno is now available for download at the iTunes Music Store for $14.99. The move marks Fox's first foray into offering new DVD releases as paid downloads through Apple's popular service, with the studio joining Paramount and Disney. Amazon's Unbox already carried the title, where it's also available to rent. Apple TV owners won't be able to rent Juno until May 14.
Despite her "power lesbian" publicist vehemently lashing out against all those pesky lesbian rumors, Ellen Page still has her work cut out for her when it comes to convincing us she doesn't (even on occasion) prefer girls. The Smart People star appeared on Leno last night to obediently promote the film, and even though Page got slightly more gussied up than usual in a tight-ish dress and heels, her inability to cross those legs comfortably coupled with an imitation of what someone looks like "lifting weights in the sunshine" did little to disspell our suspicions.
Oh cruel fate, to learn today that Ellen Page was one deleted musical scene away from certain Oscar victory. Thankfully, the kind people at Amazon have righted the sitch (man, we're getting Diablo'd just thinking about it), offering the Cafe Triste "Jub Jub" (not to be confused with the Ewok's "Yub Nub") song as a sneak peek at Juno's DVD special content.
In a moment so genuinely awkward that adorably awkward Michael Cera looks almost uncomfortably awkward living it, our knocked-up heroine sings the grrl power anthem about baby batter, dances, and tic tacs to an empty coffeehouse. Watch and we think you'll agree: had the Academy gotten their hands on this one, we would have been treated to a deadpan Page acceptance speech (did she mean there are truly angels in this city, or was that ironic?) and an unearthed interview on her refusal to believe in the Teapot Dome scandal.
Having flirted with dangerous levels of underexposure since winning her Best Screenplay Oscar a little over a month ago, Diablo Cody is back with a double-barreled blast of creative miracles. First up, The Hollywood Reporter notes that Cody's long-rumored comedy series The United States of Tara — starring Toni Collette as the title character afflicted with multiple personalities — is nearing a full-season order from Showtime. We can handle this without much difficulty — and by "handle" we mean "believe," because the second project has the calendar-conscious skeptic in us praying for an April Fool's Day revelation:
· The beauty of Jewno is in its attention to detail. To wit: a bagels, lox, & cream cheese phone. [YouTube]
· Prince at Coachella! [LAT]
· Today in sci-fi: First glimpses of the Starfleet Nerdcademy. Arthur C. Clarke dies in Sri Lanka at age 90. [aintitcool.com, Reuters]
· Watch Adam Carolla call Carrie Ann Inaba a "bitch" on last night's Dancing with the Stars premiere. [TMZ]
· CBS's godawful sitcoms post higher ratings than ever since returning from the strike. Seriously, though. Just the pits. That Christine one? And the Big Bang one? Ugh. [THR]
· Kirstie Alley has signed a deal with Harpo to develop "future television projects, including a possible daily strip format." We hope that just means a five-episode-per-week syndie, and not that Alley will be prancing around again on the Oprah stage in a bathing suit with any regularity. [ETOnline]
Towards the very end of SNL, guest host Ellen Page veered from the show's regular template for a sketch virtually bereft of jokes—more of a 3-minute mini-play, really—in which she gushes to roommate Andy Samberg of the near religious experience that was a Melissa Etheridge concert. "There were so many athletic girls in tank tops...And then the Indigo Girls came out...And then Ellen DeGeneres came out and did this bit about being in the closet when she was young! And it was so true!" Asked by Samberg if she "went gay," the reluctant-to-be-labeled character responds, "I just feel like an oil lamp that's never been lit. Why can't I just hug a woman with my legs in friendship?"
Hell hath no fury like a "power lesbian" publicist mistaken for her Oscar-nominated client's mother/love interest. At least that's what Michael Musto learned when his prurient interest in Ellen Page (and our interest in his interest) precipitated an angry call Thursday from ID-PR power flack Kelly Bush:
Our progressive neighbors to the North — they of universal health care and stealthy American media insurgency — may yet cede their place among North America's movie industry vanguard. The Toronto Globe and Mail reports that the country's Conservative leadership wants no part of backing "any film or television show that it deems offensive or not in the public's best interest - even if government agencies have invested in them." Naturally the Canadian left is mortified envisioning a future sans even the tamest of subversive exports. "Would this committee put money into Juno?" asks Toronto lawyer David Zitzerman. "It might not want to encourage teen pregnancy. Would the government put money into a film with a dirty title, like Young People Fucking? Would they invest in something like Brokeback Mountain? They might not want to encourage gay cowboys to have sex together in Alberta." Hollywood studio heads, having long endured the repercussions of Canadian filth from Strange Brew to Paul Haggis, were rumored to vigorously laud the move in a conference call Thursday.
As the bra-burning women's rights activists etched into our heads, being a feminist means having a choice: you can either choose to bake pies alongside June Cleaver, or you can choose to spray whip cream on your tits and shake your moneymaker in front of salivating men. But whichever path you choose to trek, you can always win an Oscar! Just like Diablo Cody (the artist formerly known as Brook Busey-Hunt, aka Candy Girl)! As you might expect, Diablo's triumph is proving to be an inspiration for aspiring pole dancers everywhere. As one stripper wrote on her blog, "I can't tell you how excited I am by [Cody] being shot out of the fame cannon and into the dazzling sky." Us too! But just in case Diablo's win wasn't enough to inspire these lacy ladies to put away their chaps for good, just wait til they read Cody's MySpace response to Tuesday's nudie pic revelations:
Serious as a sizzler, the strapping stripper is beginning another autobio oh dear lord I can't even keep this up for one sentence. Diablo Cody's writing a second memoir, hopefully to get past the "hey look, the stripper wrote a book" phase of her life, which hadn't disappeared over the years but only became "hey look, the stripper wrote a movie." Good news, really, judging by Juno. I mean think about it: The first act is cloying and fake, but the rest is authentic and artistic. Either way, it should be a lot better than her Entertainment Weekly column.
It's quite the week of firsts for Diablo Cody. She won her first Oscar, she became embroiled in her first red carpet scandal and now, the first nude pictures of her have hit The Internets. Probably not surprising, considering her famed and well-marketed history as a stripper turned blogger turned screenwriter. A few of the more SFW pics, including her faithful recreation of Ali Larter's whipped cream bikini shot from Varsity Blues (somewhere, a Vanity Fair photog is kicking himself for not thinking of this idea first), appear after the jump.
Shhhhh...Don't speak above a whisper, or you may awaken 2008's Best Original Screenplay Oscar winner Diablo Cody, sleeping off a night of hard and well-deserved partying flanked by some tried-and-true comforts; namely, hotel sheets, a plate of chocolate chip cookies, and a naked, well-muscled guy she can barely get a hand around.
Hipsters can complain about it all they want, but America has fully embraced the Junoverse. Not only is it the most popular of this year's Best Picture nominees ($125 million and counting), it also has an excellent chance of pulling off a Crash-style upset come Sunday. While we seemingly hear the phrase "it's the closest Oscar race in years" each and every awards season, this year it might actually be true. No one movie stands out as a frontrunner. No Country For Old Men is confusing, There Will Be Blood is looooong and grim, 6 people saw Michael Clayton and Atonement feels like an afterthought. That leaves Juno. Just because you sit in your little Silverlake apartment hating on all that overwritten dialogue doesn't mean the rest of the country didn't find it utterly charming.
· In an uncomfortable marriage pitting one of the coolest brands on the planet with, um, a lesser-cool brand, Apple has become a signature sponsor of American Idol. What does this mean for you, the Apple/Idol fan? iTunes carries show downloads, the iPod becomes the show's "official digital music player," and the company's next top-secret product launch, the iPaula, will perform all the functions of the iPhone, but with improved wasted and weepy functionality. [Variety]
· Toshiba concedes defeat in the high-def war, giving Blu-ray the official win, and relegating HD-DVD to the obsolete technology junkpile. (Attention unnamed dance-punk bands: Blu-Ray Or HD-DVD is up for grabs!) [Variety]
One of our favorite Oscar traditions is the menu of original cocktails inspired by the five Best Picture nominees, as devised by the clever bartending staff of The Polo Lounge. We gave them a call to see what they came up with this year (yes, these are all real):
· To honor No Country for Old Men, they have Blood and Sand: Johnny Walker Red, cherry brandy, sweet vermout, and a splash of OJ served strained in martini glass. Enough of those should give you a hangover that feels like a bolt-stunner to the melon.
· The Juno drink is a Blue Slushee, named for the frozen treat our hero upchucks into her stepmother's urn: Stoli raspberry, blue curacao, and lemonade, blended with ice.
With just weeks to go before Diablo Cody graduates from obscure screenwriter to global household name among Oscar's billion-man viewing audience, we thought we'd take another look at what lies just beyond her blinding horizon. Having already stolen a peek at Jennifer's Body, the horror project all but guaranteed to usher the expression "Slow down tardy slip. You sound like a sped," into the popular lexicon, Something Awful has just stumbled upon the first three pages of her next script, replete with Cody-authored margin notes. Quotey (a Diablo Cody Parody™), is a "dramedy about a brilliant-yet-spunky screenwriter who says what we all think but still faces persecution for her quirky ways." Will Quotey and boyfriend Braniel make love work? Will the Mountain Goats still be cool by the release date? Is "Spill the beans, you bean-factory worker with Parkinson's," too edgy for Diablo's newfound mass audience? Not to worry: Throw a skinny-legged high school track team jogging in the background of every third shot, and everything else will fall into place. The full page containing the excerpt above is after the jump.
Because there are no new ideas left anywhere, the super duper hit film Juno is getting its very own knocked-up knock-off. Brenda Hampton, the woman behind the odious 7th Heaven, is peddling a new series about a young teenager who gets pregnant after a tryst with a popular boy at school. But there's a little nerdy kid who likes her too! What will she do? Probably say sassy things and talk on a hotdog phone. [NYMag]
We love to love smartass Juno screenwriter and ex-dancing girl Diablo Cody. But not in a weird way, like this guy. He wrote an essay about the "at least nine things" they have in common, and recently accosted a lookalike screenwriter on the WGA picket line, mistaking her for Cody. "My sign today on the picket lines at NBC," he blogs. "ASK ME ABOUT THE NINE THINGS I HAVE IN COMMON WITH DIABLO CODY." OK, fine. What are they?
