Temperamental and/or difficult actors are nothing new, of course, but as alluded to earlier today in our glimpse at the new-and-slightly-spiritually-improved Mike Myers, it takes a special kind of difficult to make the "stroppy" cut. To wit, does your rep for tantrums, whining and/or demanding final cut equal or exceed your rep for such actions making your films better? Then you might be headed for the All-Strop Team, as laid out today by Guardian contributor Andrea Hubert: Folks like Edward Norton (the captain), Eddie Murphy (the leadoff hitter, if only for knowing when to take a walk on Pluto Nash), Gwyneth Paltrow (the cleanup hitter, for publicly referring to her film View From the Top as View From My Ass) and others.

Today’s news that Ryan Phillippe and Reese Witherspoon’s seven-year long marriage has just now “officially” ended invites all kinds of speculation on just why it took nearly two years for the divorce proceedings to finalize. Citing “irreconcilable differences” all the way back in 2006, the blonde duo split amid speculation that Ryan’s bad boy behavior ranged from publicly making out with current girlfriend Abbie Cornish on the Texas set of Stop Loss to an increasing level of resentment regarding his wife’s fast-rising star status. And while celebrity divorces do typically take longer than usual, considering how many more properties, cars, adultery allegations and cash they tend to have, we find the timing of this particular pair’s final John Hancocks a little suspicious given the past month's unusually abundant Reese-and-Ryan gossip flood. Is today’s news just a coincidence, or did each party's very public pictorial statements recently have anything to do with it?

· Hot-new-screenwriting-thing Dan Mazeau has been hired by DreamWorks to whip the script for Untitled Doug Liman Moon-Colonizing Project Starring Impossibly Swoony-Eyed Lunar-Settling Dreamboat Jake Gyllenhaal into shape. [THR]
· Top-rated GSN poker shows High Stakes Poker and World Poker Tour have yet to be renewed, and many fans are concerned that the new network president David Goldhill might cancel them. Asked to comment, Goldhill played things close the vest, peering out from beneath the rim of his lucky Harrah's sun visor in a pair of wraparound Blublockers as he gnawed silently on a complimentary chicken wing. [THR]
· VH1 orders Scream Queens, a reality show that attempts to find America's Next Top Co-Ed Who Insists on Wandering into the Laundry Room Alone Knowing A Killer Is Loose on Campus. [THR]
· Amber Tamblyn will star in ABC's The Unusuals, playing "Detective Casey Shraeger, a smart cop who also is the black sheep of her wealthy family." [THR]
· Harrison Ford's next role will be playing the real-world dad who stopped at nothing to find a cure for his son's rare condition. Just to clarify, this character is not Indiana Jones, and his son's condition is not Ow LaBeouf's Balls. [Variety]

The uninspired recycling of played-out mediocrity received a sleek bit of Hollywood upscaling over the last 24 hours, with no less than Jake Gyllenhaal, Christian Bale and the money gang at Sony Pictures climbing on the remake/franchise gravy train with some of the most appalling anti-ideas we've heard around these parts since that Donnie Darko sequel went fungal just before Cannes. After the jump, find out which of these warmed-over properties — Prince Of Persia? Flash Gordon? Highlander? Terminators 4, 5 & 6? — drove us to break our "No Drinking Before 5pm On Weekdays" rule.

· So David Letterman goes to the trouble of getting Kevin Spacey a Jamba Juice, per his request, and Spacey thanks him by dumping the entire thing—on his carpet. Moral of the story? Never pay it forward, at least where Spacey is concerned. [Late Show]
· Hey—Carrie Bradshaw left her Mac desktop open for anyone to just snoop around in. We really shouldn't. Well...maybe just for a second. What does this Stickie say? "Buy...black suit...for Miranda's...funeral." Oh no! We should have never snooped! [Carrie's Macbook]
· And the "world's biggest star" teased for the Idol finale is...George Michael? [E! Online]
· Jake Gyllenhaal has been confirmed as the lead in the Jerry Bruckheimer-produced Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time for Disney. It's about time Jake got a superhero franchise! Now, if you'll excuse us, we're off to buy an Xbox 360 and every edition of the Prince of Persia series, mastering every last trap door and hidden level in time for the movie's release. We suggest you do the same. Jake deserves nothing less. [THR]

[Photo Credit: Flynet]

All the drama affecting David O. Russell's new film Nailed settled down a bit Monday when production resumed on the South Carolina set. But while the producers squared away their money issues with SAG, which shut shooting down last Friday, our own suspicions about precariously-budgeted distributor ThinkFilm got another look from Variety yesterday afternoon:

We can't imagine how or why, after the ordeals of Three Kings and I Heart Huckabees, trouble could possibly find its way back to the set of a David O. Russell film. Alas, there it is — or, was, rather, in South Carolina, where only three weeks after resident cookie-choking expert James Caan quit the project, both the Teamsters and IATSE are grumpy and SAG reportedly shut production down because of "insufficient funds on deposit with the guild." And that's just the beginning, writes Nikki Finke:

WTF. Wooden almost actor Jake Gyllenhaal apparently dated wooden former first daughter Chelsea Clinton, according to Star. In 1999! When he wasn't even famous! Apparently their parents knew each other. We don't buy a word of this. Why is it coming out now? Last-ditch effort to rescue Hillary Clinton's campaign with star power? Also according to this story, Chelsea Clinton thinks Jake should marry Reese Witherspoon. According to a "source." That "source" is drugs. [Star]

· We continue with today's theme of leaked, bootlegged trailers of the summer's most anticipated blockbusters with the new Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, set to premiere before screenings of Iron Man this Friday. Dare we say, it's a vast improvement over the first. Indy's back, everyone! No, seriously. Indy's back—it just gave out on him. Medic! [indianajones.com]
· Is "closet chef" Jake Gyllenhaal planning on opening his own restaurant before he turns 30? Sign us up for one Dreamy-Eyed Tasting Menu with Naggy Girlfriend Wine Flight! [Big Hospitality]
· Good news: Roger Waters's pig has been found! Bad news: In pieces. Good news: Bacon for everyone! Bad news: It tastes like polyurethane. [MyDesert.com]
· Is Transformers 2 about to get a much-needed injection of menstrual-blood humor? One can only hope. [Cinematical]
· Hey—dogs into unicorns! [Archie McPhee]
· Oops...We almost forgot to salute our man Will Leitch over at Deadspin, who on HBO's Costas Now last night withstood a spittle-storm of invective from Buzz Bissinger, author of Friday Night Lights and owner of a rocking set of he-breasts. [Deadspin]

While running through LAX yesterday, temperamental star Jake Gyllenhaal made a call to both his manager and agent to complain about the size of the airport. Gyllenhaal felt that the airport was too big and that more airports should have a downhome feel like John Wayne does. Gyllenhaal then complained that the security officer who helped the actor through the airport spent too much time asking him how his flight was and not enough fending off the paparazzi. Gyllenhaal then demanded that his agents set up a meeting with Diablo Cody, mainly because he wanted to see how long it would take for him to get her naked. Gyllenhaal then paused for a moment to catch his breath and, when he did, he finally came to his senses and fell directly to the floor. Once on the floor, Gyllenhaal rested in a fetal position and whispered into his phone: "I can't do work with David O. Russell anymore. I can't. I want Fincher back. I want to do take after take for ten hours straight."

James Caan and Jake Gyllenhaal are the latest casualties of David O. Russell's tastefully hands-on directing style, which this week resulted in the Caan's departure from and Gyllenhaal's apparent whimpering around the set of Russell's latest film, Nailed. As reported today, Caan walked out after "creative differences" with the tempestuous filmmaker best known for berating Lily Tomlin while shooting I Heart Huckabees (or is it for fighting George Clooney during Three Kings? It's always been too close for us to call).

In addition to the regular team of assistants, Jake Gyllenhaal has employed a personal umbrella holder on the set of Nailed. Using his iPhone, the Brokeback Mountain star discovered that there was a slight chance of rain in the forecast for Columbia, South Carolina and did not want to take the risk of getting wet in the short distance between his trailer and set.

GYLLENHOBBLED! Jake Gyllenhaal was captured on crutches, reportedly for having twisted his ankle during a pickup basketball game. Hours later, Santa Monica Blvd. in WeHo was packed with dozens of well-muscled pedestrians sporting the same crutches-with-army-green-Crocs look. Photo: X17 Online. [omg.yahoo.com]

An angry movie watcher caught up with actor Jake Gyllenhaal in a Southern California parking structure, demanding that Jake give him his "hard-earned" money back for the film Zodiac. The disgruntled man said that it was a three hour movie where nothing happens, and even made extra sure to point out that, by the end of the film, the crime hadn't even been solved! Gyllenhaal successfully defended the film, citing it as some of his best work. He even went as far to say that Jeffrey Wells loved it. The Polo ensconced amateur photog then walked away frustrated, wishing that he would've mentioned either The Day After Tomorrow or Bubble Boy instead.

PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers, and are posted several times a week, so send them in often—the fate of the universe relies upon it! Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line so we don't lose them) and tell everyone about the time you noticed Dennis Rodman manhandling a minor at Koi.

• Actor Robert Downey Jr. is about to be in blackface in a movie, but it's totally OK because it's so meta: Downey will not wear blackface to pretend to be black; he will wear blackface to pretend to be a white actor pretending to be black. Totally different. [Film School Rejects via Digg]

"Reese Witherspoon & Jake Gyllenhaal are seated right next to me at del posto. She is adorable as usual, but he is SO unbelievable hot!! They are laughing and having a great time. Love them together!!"

Instruct your assistant to hold all your calls, poor yourself a tumbler of whiskey, and fire up the Bose Wave to ease you into haunting opening strums of Gustavo Santaolalla's "The Wings"—this next one's going to be a little rough. Sources from the New Mexico set of Jake Gyllenhaal's new movie Brothers tell People that the actor is "devastated" since learning of his Brokeback Mountain sharpshooting partner's death:

PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers, and are posted several times a week, so send them in often! Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line so we don't lose them) and tell everyone about the time you saw Randy "S'aight Dawg" Jackson whiz by you on a Segway.