· Earlier, when we said Jake Gyllenhaal was out walking his dog and unavailable to hold forth on Israeli-Palestinian relations, we were kidding. Of course we knew he's up in Alaska Canada with Salma Hayek and talking global warming with the Inuits!
· Steven Spielberg does his best to invalidate his work on this year's summer blockbuster: " "I have to certainly believe what my heart tells me. That the first time there is a meeting of the minds between extraterrestrials and human beings, it's going to be friendly."
· Just this one time, copycat lawsuits sound like a really, really good idea, at least if they'll prevent a second season.
· "Eight years of blow." Chris Kattan's career, explained! [fifth item]
· Can't anyone on Craigslist try to get laid without turning it into an acting audition?

Unfortunately, dreamy-eyed brother Jake was unavailable to offer his thoughts on America's role in Israeli-Palestinian relations, as he was busy walking his dog in Runyon Canyon.

· Towleroad continues its comprehensive coverage of all developments in the timeline of gay cowboy epic Brokeback Mountain by filling in the blanks in some screenshots from its "cockteaser trailer."
· Words fail us when trying to describe the mangled mess that's replaced Jackie Stallone's face, but we'll take a crack at describing it as "watery Play-doh."
· The Tinseltown Tattle-Tale drops by Funnsylvania for a little gossip session...why aren't we getting these hot scoops?
· Edward Furlong can't shut up about lobsters: "Lobsters, they are great spirits and they need to roam free." Especially if you're shitfaced at the time you realize that lobster liberation is such a lofty goal.
· Disney is opening an entire unit dedicated to the skillful knocking-off of their Pixar collaborations.

Jake Gyllenhaal tells Elle magazine that Brokeback Mountain's cowboy-on-cowboy action wasn't all stolen glances on horseback or lightly-strummed prairie ballads around the campfire. He reckons that sometimes a man's gotta put on the chaps and the six-shooters and get down to the dirty business of cowpoke love: