Ponies are small, yes, but they are not small enough to bring on a train with you. And yet this did not seem to stop a man in Wales, who attempted to board a train at the Wrexham General station over the weekend, only to be rebuffed by the conductor. It did not end there, either; the man then attempted to buy two tickets from the ticket booth (one for him and one for the pony), and was turned away again. He was later seen at the Wrexham Maelor Hospital (for humans), asking for treatment for the pony from a doctor. [BBC]

Are you sure that your doctor is a real doctor? It can be difficult to tell! For example, if he gives you a bottle of pills called "Prosperous Farmer Dietary Supplements" that expired in 2002, he is probably not credentialed.

All around the world people have started planking—lying face-down, stiff, and expressionless across cheerleaders, their pet camels, and other weird and dangerous places, then posting pics of their stunts online. It's pretty fun, when nothing terrible and tragic happens.

The next time you're getting drunk in some bar — let's call it Boomer's — and a stranger suddenly offers to take you to the bank and help you open up a new account, maybe don't go with them. Yeah, just keep on drinking.

In Louisiana, a black man who was convicted for murder is seeking to overturn his conviction on several grounds, the most interesting of which is this: he contends that the fact that the Confederate flag flies in front of the courthouse where he was convicted is evidence of discrimination.

The killing of Osama bin Laden has put a renewed focus on pumping time and money into failed counter-terrorism measures across America. So now, since ever-vigilant Senator Chuck Schumer has nothing better to do with his time, he wants to start a "no-ride list" for Amtrak trains across the country. That sounds like a great idea, because we all know how well the "no-fly list" has worked out for the airlines. Just ask any of the little kids who can't get on a flight with their parents. Or, ask the men sitting in jail for trying to blow people up on airplanes.

Did you hear that Barack Obama demanded a massive American flag be removed from Ground Zero while he was there yesterday? It's not true! At all.

Have you, too, heard the sound of Rush Limbaugh patting himself on his gross back all afternoon? Because he sure pulled a quick one on the liberal media today! He opened his radio show by heaping praise on the president, even saying "Thank God for President Obama." Hey now... really?

The most confusing thing about this clip from The 700 Club, wherein Pat Robertson explains that married liberal women have abortions in order to put themselves on "a level playing field" with childless lesbians, is that he seems to think lesbians can't have children. Whatever you do, Pat, do not watch The Kids Are Alright. [via Little Green Footballs]

Social conservative and evangelical David Barton is against net neutrality because he says it goes against the principles of Ben Franklin, the Pilgrims, and the Bible.

Ah, spring, when a young man's fancy turns to love, and minor Republican officials start emailing racist JPEGs about the Obama family to one another. This week's casual racist: Orange County Republican Party central committee member Marilyn Davenport.

Ocherous churl Donald Trump slouched beast-like to Fox News on Friday night, where he engaged in something called "The Trump Interview" with right-wing backboard Sean Hannity. It was, yes, essentially unwatchable, but Trump revealed, in the course of the evening, that he has become a subscriber to the third most prevalent anti-Obama conspiracy, namely, that Obama's book Dreams From My Father was written by former Weatherman and current "super-genius" Bill Ayers. Ernest Hemingway was brought up, as was Trump's own opus, The Art of the Deal:

Last week an ad was emailed to J. Crew customers featuring a photo of the company's president and creative director Jenna Lyons and her son in which she was painting his toenails pink. A caption below the picture read: "Lucky for me I ended up with a boy whose favorite color is pink. Toenail painting is way more fun in neon." Oh, fun. Good for her. Good for him. Right? Wrong. This is an outrage!

When a crazy lady attacked Paul Gauguin's "Two Tahitian Women" in the National Gallery earlier this week, it wasn't just an attack on one painting; it was an attack on local TV news directors having an easy day, for once.

Got a spare RQ-11B Raven spy drone lying around? If so, don't try to sell it on the internet!

Michael Mustica, a 22-year-old tire salesman from New Jersey, kicked off his Atlantic City vacation in style last October by drinking two and a half cans of alcoholic energy drink Four Loko and falling asleep. Little did he know that when he woke up, things would never be the same!

Toronto tattoo artist Andrew Ottenhof got a tattoo of Charlie Sheen wearing a tiger head. It also has the Twitter bird and a couple of hash tags. One of these days, Andrew is going to wish he could chop this off with a machete. Oh, and next time someone asks if there's anyone stupider and crazier than Charlie Sheen, point them toward Canada.

The most noteworthy feature of the new WashingtonPost.com redesign: its opinion section (the world's worst) now features "Left-Leaning" and "Right-Leaning" tabs, so that you can comfortably segregate yourself in the opinion ghetto of your choice. The Washington Post is now perfectly fair!

Click to viewPeople around the world have been struggling to comprehend the tragedy that hit Japan on Friday. Even Fox News personality Glenn Beck! "I'm not saying God is... causing earthquakes," he told his Monday radio listeners. "I'm not not saying that either."

The typical day in the life of a New York City bike messenger apparently involves swigging whisky during breaks while constantly dodging potentially fatal traffic.